Random Rants

There are times when I just want to rant about things without thinking too much.

Like how impossible sometimes this little girl behave until I wonder did I miss something important along the way? or is it just me being more impatient? Or is it just me who wants everything to be under control everytime? So, who’s being impossible here?

There are times when I wonder how could this be so hard? I know it won’t be easy, but dealing with a pre teen who already could talk back to you for every little thing you ask her to do, who already has her own opinion about daily things and refuse to follow what others want. Or is it just me who’s being too slow and easily exhausted about catching up with her quick growth?

I don’t know. Or I just don’t want everything to change quickly and stay forever in ‘easy’ zone😭😭😭.

Jump to another rant.

I feel like having more (in this case : money) doesn’t make things necessarily easier. It makes life easier at certain point, but, it’s absolutely much harder when it comes to control. We once defined one specific number which we considered as ‘sufficient’ many years ago. Thought if we got that number monthly, we were good.

Fast forward few years, we have passed way above that number, yet, many times I feel perplexed looking at the expense and thinking how come our mere expense now equals the number we set few years ago?

Although I think we’re doing well on saving, helping, and investing, but looking at our consumption expense, there are times where I feel guilty and feel like need doing more justifications to make it feel right. To be secured that those were for a greater good, that we deserve it.

From my own view, life style is not something that is hard to adjust when you have more. We still use my old car for the last 10 years, we still go around by bus or angkot to many places, the doctor is still using taxi or ojek (rarely) to go to work, we divide house chores among us, no maid, no driver, we use our old clothes, till when I looked at some pictures, same clothes appeared too often😂.

Yet, in the other side, things have been drastically changed. The hardships are more to resist the temptations for better life qualities.

We spend more for higher, healthier, and better qualities for many products or services we use. We spend more to live in better area which is closer to work and school also dealing with less traffic jam. We could dine out , in any kind of places, anytime we want to do it without thinking too hard.

We couldn’t help using real italian or french cheese in making pasta, best quality meat for making steak, the oil we use daily, weekly spending for fruits now equals to a bi-weekly expense for the whole groceries in the past, replacing rice with greens for breakfast made me understand someone who said rice was cheap. Education expenses are on the rise too. But won’t go into details about that.

I had been in certain periods where money was an issue, before and after marriage, and those were hard. The saying money can’t buy happiness is only true once you have the money.

Then, once you’re blessed with more, it comes with certain price too. For me, it means you have to deal a lot with what is inside. Be it your ego or self control. When you have less, there’s nothing much to think about, simple because it’s not there. Dealing with more means it requires more meticulous planning, more disciplined and self control. Thinking is not an easy job to do.

Spiderman uncle was right when he said that with great power comes great responsibility.

Well, enough ranting for now. Still have few more to go, but lets save them for another day.