Author: arlanadya

Pas special, J'ai seulement besoin de beaucoup de privee
Posted in Favorite things, Travel

Morning reminiscing : On travelling

Posted on by arlanadya

I am constantly missing something these days. Traveling. Never been anywhere,literally, for almost 2 years. I miss airports, packed-luggages, stamped-passport and everything about it.

Recently, little brother-in law has just departed to Manchester, pursuing his master degree in UoM. Went with his pregnant wife to the very same city I had been exactly 20 years ago where my father pursued his master degree.

Since it is impossible to go anywhere right now and maybe still (quite) impossible in the next few years, maybe reminiscing some of my traveling experiences done with my family in past years will do :

1. June 1994, Manchester,UK

Have written about this completely in the previous post. My very first flying experience abroad by Emirates. It was beyond awesome.
Visited several other cities too such London,Sheffield, Harrogate, Buxton, Bath, Blackburn, and Stockport.
It brought more than a mere experience of living abroad or vacation for me. It had greater impact which benefits me in so many things in my life in upcoming years.
It was 20 years ago, yet, those days still vividly pictured in my mind like it was just a week ago.

2. October 2003, Saudi Arabia

It took 9 years until our second big trip together. It was right after my birthday that we were leaving for Mecca and Medina to do our first Umra.
Since we flew with Gulf Air, we stopped by and stayed for a night in Manama,Bahrain also. Two nights actually, depart and return. It was quite a bonus.
Couldn’t helped crying while seeing Ka’bah for the first time. Live. I felt so small. Not forget to mention, it was not an ordinary Umra. It was a-Ramadhan-Umra. Having experienced Ramadhan Umra was something special. It was double bonuses.

We enjoyed break-fasting together in the mosque. Came only with a glass of tea and few dates but returned to hotel with youghurt,bread,and any other food given from others. Tarawih prayer was done in 23 raka’at and I was not able to keep up with that. Exhausting:-(

Strangely, we had more energy to walk around the shopping malls after tarawih for hours:-))
All the market and shopping malls were closed during the day in Ramadhan. Instead, they started opening after Asar till sahur.

I decided to wear jilbab after returned. Another thing that proved traveling brought more than merely going to some places. It went far beyond that.

3. May 2008, Batam-Singapore

After returned Umra, I started having a long-term traveling plans. I started saving for Hajj and visiting other countries. Not long after I returned from Umra, I got my first permanent job as a piano teacher. So, it helped a lot. I saved religiously and buying US Dollars once the balance reach 10 millions rupiahs. Yes, thinking about that right now, it was quite unbelievable that I had almost USD 6000 few years ago:))

Singapore was the first country I went with others without any of my family members. I went with my dad collegues, staying in a budget hotel, wandering on the Orchard Road by myself, visiting Borders ( a-most-fascinating book store i had ever seen), Takashimaya, Isetan, the famous Merlion statue, and stopped by Sentosa Island using cable car.

I remember a quote from Ibnu Batuta, if I am not mistaken, saying, “Traveling, it makes you speechless then turn you into a story teller”. Something like that.

It is definitely true. When I came home, I couldn’t stop telling everyone at home about my first ‘solo’ trip until they had it more than enough:))

4. November 2008, KL,Malaysia

Just 6 months after my Singapore trip, I had another chance of going on ‘solo’ trip. It was the most impulsive trip that I have ever had. It came suddenly out of nothing.

Started when me and my family plan to visit my grandma after a wedding reception. It was just an usual visit on Sunday. Then, one of my aunt was there too at grandma’s house. I didn’t know how it began, suddenly there was a convo that my aunt would leave for KL on Tuesday for a confrence. Nothing special with that.

What stunned me at that time was she suddenly asked me to join her. Told me that I just needed to buy the tickets and I could stay in a-5-stars hotel where the confrence took place with her. She said that I just needed to prepare for the tickets and some pocket money for 4 days.

My heart was racing hearing all those offers. But, the problem was I had my job and it was too sudden. How could I obtain a permission from my principal in one day notice? It was Sunday and she planned to leave on Tuesday.

It even seemed more impossible at that time where my partner was currently in Australia for student exchange, so I was alone in-charge for the class. If I left too, then no teacher in charge for the class for several days. And, I just started working there only about 4 months. So many impossibilities laid over head.

I spent the rest of Sunday thinking over and over about that. It was a very rare chance, but yet, how I could conquer all those impossibilities. What reason to be explained to gain the permission. It was really an experience;))

I went to school on Monday with a very heavy heart. Mentally prepared to talk with my principal. She was ok actually and I was pretty close too, but she could be very strict. I had prepare my reason and truthfully, I had said yes to my aunt on Sunday night. Should remember that I could be that insane in the past years:))

I talked to my principal slowly, telling her that I had to go for immediate and urgent family matters for three days and apologized for this sudden notice since the bussiness also came suddenly and could not be delayed at all. It was very important for me to go.

At first, she was very surprised. Leaving the class for three days, when my partner was not there too, maybe she thought I didn’t have my consciousness. But since I have started everything so I had to go all the way. Then she started to slowly accepted it by asking me if i could shorten it for two days or even one day. I told her that it was quite impossible since the ticket had been issued and etc.

I think it was very true that everything that should be yours will really go to you no matter how,when, and where. This trip taught me that. I left my principal office with her permission and simple order that I had to prepare everything while I was absent. I entered the room as if carried a big rock in my heart and left with my as-light-as feather heart:D

I flew with Malaysian Airlines this time. When I remembered again, I think it was not an economy class since the price was quite expensive and it was very spacious. So different with one I went few next years when I went there to study.

Arrived at KLIA at 11 pm and had a taxi to the hotel. My aunt had her, i dont know how it called, but a malaysian young man that once stayed at her house for a months before, so this man had escorted me and my aunt during our staying, not always, but most of the time.

Thanks to him, I went to many interesting places. He took me to Istana Negara, eating a delicuous rojak nearby, bought me a ticket to go up the famous Petronas Twin Towers, yes I went up there to the 42nd floor, tried sate Kajang, went to Putrajaya at night, and many other places. It was the very first time too I rode on two-doors BMW, with a guy that I just known in few days,alone:))

I also had my literally solo trip there. I went to Melaka with a tour group by bus. I went alone while my aunt had her confrence. It was a one-day trip. Oh, I was also recently broke up with le husband that time. Our worst one. So, during the trip, I had a very good time to think about everything happened. It was a great escape.

What funny was, 4 years later, around the same month, I went to Melaka for the second time with that one I broke-up with,while he was visiting me when I studied my master degree. Sometimes, life is truly beyond belief:).

Melaka was like a historical city. I went to the famous chirstchurch, and eformosa ( not sure about the spelling), the deserted castle-like from Portuguese colonial.

I also had unexpected lunch date with a Turkish man from the tour since only both of us were moslem while the tour leader chose a non halal chinese restaurant for lunch. So, we had our lunch in Secret Recipe together and had small talks which made us almost missed and being left by the bus back to KL:))

I had to go home earlier than scheduled when my mum called from Jakarta that I had passed the test on Bappenas and had to have the next test on Saturday morning. So, I had to change my flight to Friday evening so I could attend the test the following day.

Since I arrived at KL so late at night, I had not have a chance to look around the airport. But, blessing in disguise, thanks to the flight change, I could wander around KLIA by my self before take-off. I bought small gift from Harrods, went to other terminal by the train inside the airport, it was really exciting.

I really hope I can be as good as my parents to my kids later for them not to miss such experiences and opportunities in their life later. I really hope I could give them better than I had.

5. June 2010, Istanbul,Turkey and Second Umra

I had a chance to visit the Holy cities for the second time on 2010 and this time it was plus Istanbul. It was so exciting. We flew with Turkish Airlines.

Stayed for 3 days at Istanbul, visiting Grand Bazaar, Hagia Sophia, Blue Mosque, Topkapi Palace, and cruising Bosphorus strait. It was crossing the border between Asia and Europe.

We proceeded to Medina from Istanbul and stayed for 3 days then continued the journey to Holy Mecca to perform Umra.

I didn’t have so many memorable moments on this trip. It was fun but it felt a bit different. Dunno what.

It might be only 5 trips, but the benefits stay for tens years ahead..

Posted in Maternité, Uncategorized

Pre-motherhood journey,so far..

Posted on by arlanadya

People say that being a mother can turn your world ups and downs. For these (almost) 30 years of my life, there are certain things that I have never experienced before, but on this journey, I finally have.

I have never been hospitalized during these 30 years. Not even once. Alhamdulillah. Last Friday was the very first time I had been admitted to the hospital. It was when I found fresh blood on the tissue I used after took a pee. It was after teaching on my school’s bathroom.

I have been experiencing few moments that could make my heart stop beating. But, last Friday, it was the very first time I felt my heart and my brain stopped working at the same time when I saw those bloody tissue in my hand. For some time, I think I was going insane.

I couldn’t help calling le husband in an instant. It made me crazier when he didn’t pick it up at first. When he finally made it, I told him abruptly. He told me to go to hospital in an instant.

I didn’t go,instead, I sat for some times in my car. Trying to figure out what really happened. Still not clear. Then when I finally made up my mind, I left the car in school and took a cab to hospital.

Along the way, I couldn’t think of any single thing. Even when I arrived at the hospital,walking by myself,telling the nurse what my problem was, I felt surreal.

When the doctor finished with his examination and told me that it was ok. But,we couldn’t take this lightly and he was strongly recommended that I had to be hospitalized right here right now. Then I realized how big it was, i felt so scare.

The thought that I might do something that harm this little creature inside my womb was very scary. I insisted not to be hospitalized at first, since it scared me to death also. I hate hospital,yet I married to a doctor.

But, I finally gave it up. I ended up not only being hospitalized for the first time in my life, but also other several things beyond my imagination. Having my hand with ‘infus’, being given a medecine from my buttocks, not enough, I had had to pee on the bed using ‘pispot’ and having the nurses to cleaned up that bottom part and my pee. I even had my whole body cleaned by others on the bed.

So far, motherhood has been quite tough. But, in spite of all those things I have been through and will be going through, I think it worths all the sacrifices in the world.

Posted in The Big Three

A Lazy Sunday Morning Random Thought

Posted on by arlanadya

I really love sunny Sunday Morning, especially when I have nothing to be done later. My mind wander here and there, think about many things. It’s quite enjoyable.

This morning I decided writing after having some conversations with little brother about pursuing a degree abroad.

I talked quite much since I had been there. Doing all the process about that for more than a year. That was one of my most-alive moments in my life. The times when you felt so excited everytime you woke up in the morning knowing that you had something to do. It was a journey to make your dream came true.

I did all the research thoroughly. From choosing universities, practising IELTS, searching for scholarships,etc. I spent hours in front of that old computer before went to work or after, and sometimes until late at night.

My 6,5-IELTS-score was the most proud real result of those hard work that I have been doing during that time. I couldn’t afford to take a preparation class due to time and yeah,money constraint. I actually could ask my father to lend me some, but I chose not to. I thought that I could save the money for other purposes and better made some time to practice it alone since the resources were available on the internet.

So I sat every morning,literally every morning,after subuh working on almost every IELTS preparation tests available online for an hour. At first, it seemed so difficult and made me think and re-think that I was not be able to do this unless someone taught me. But, still, I kept working on it every morning and the score started progressing.

In spite of all those efforts, until just few days before the test, my score was still quite lower than 6,5. I became a little bit anxious. Wondering whether I had really tried my best. Questioned my self often, what a-3-million-rupiahs meant for taking a preparation class if it worked better to make your dream realized than suffered for days doing it alone, altough I didn’t have to spend any money. I could earn some money again later, but the time would not return.

For me, having a-6,5-IELTS-score was extremely important and urgent at that time. It couldn’t wait any longer. The clock was ticking. If I failed, than I might have had to give it up until I didn’t know when.

At the same time as I was studying hard for it,since the test quite costly too, (it was about USD 180 or around 2 million rupiahs), I was working from Monday to Sunday. Yes kids, from Monday to Sunday, you read it right. In three different places : Elementary school, music school, and teaching private piano to an expat on Sunday. Didn’t I feel tired? If the question was asked now, I wouldn’t even dream about working that crazily. But back then, it was nothing about feeling tired. I was enjoying all of that since I knew I had a bigger purpose of doing it more than merely just the money.

The test were taken on a Saturday morning. I made special time to do it since saturday was actually my teaching day at music school. So I had replaced it on another day before.

I remembered when I arrived at the test venue, it was quite nerve-wracking. I didn’t know it would be that crowded. The queue was very long for registration and they were very strict that we couldn’t be late.
Thankfully, the registration was quite smooth. Then, the second anxiety came. I saw people reading book everywhere while I wasn’t bring any at all. I never study when it is the day of the exam. It makes me more nervous.

It was even worse when I heard some people next to me talking that it was their second or third time retaking the test after attending the preparation class. How could I not feel so agitated hearing those things? If they were failing after taking class and so on, then what about me?:|

Not for long, they started calling names to enter the room. Then, the things started to fall nicely in its place.

When they called my name, I was appointed to a small room, not a big hall, which the less people the better, so you could be more focus.

Next best thing was they had also prepared for the seat. We could not choose by ourself where we wanted to sit. Mine? I got a front-row middle seat with both audio speakers next to me. One in my left and another one on my right. It was truly Allah’s helping hand worked there.

The luck didn’t stop there. I nailed the listening and structure section since I could hear everything clearly. When I opened the reading section, 4 out of 5 reading texts were about classical music, education, and an interesting psychological article which was quite easy to understand. It was soo different with any other IELTS texts that I had been practising before which were very long and hard to understand. My smile were getting wider and wider.

It was a total Allah’s help on that day. Even the writing and speaking, I got the topics that I was really well-comprehended. Finished taking all the sections that day, I felt no regrets at all for whatever the result would be.

I received my IELTS score result exactly on my birthday. It was Friday of 23rd October.

I fetched the result during my school break time. Had the anxiety since morning. It was the day that would tell me whether I could continue or had to stop. The result would decide where my life would be in the following year. It made all the difference.

I arrived at the venue around 12 pm. It was very hot sunny day. While walking towards the venue, I kept soothing my self when the result was not as I expected. Keep talking that I had tried all my best with all the resources I had. Then, if it was not now, maybe Allah saved another better time later in the future. But, deep down inside, I knew it would be pretty heart-breaking if I failed. I surely would be 1000%.

I took a very long and deep breath when I received the result on my hand before opening it. When I opened the envelope, and saw that 6,5 score and other scores were all 6,0 and some section above that, I couldn’t help crying. I couldn’t believe that I really make it. As if you were freed from a heavy burden after few weeks. It was beyond words to express how it felt.

I returned to school with so much lighter heart, knowing that the hope was really there and it was getting real and near. Could not help stop smiling for the rest of the day. That day, I had given my self the best birthday gift I could receive during 25 years of my life.

I finally made it to go abroad on December 2010. A year after the test. It wasn’t europe as I longed for, but it was even a better place that was chosen for me.

So kids, always remember this :

If it is really your dream, you won’t be making any excuses to make it happened. You will really try to find any possible way to make it.
Work hard and patience will never fail you. It will always be paid.

Do your best of the best, Allah will SURELY takes care all the rest.

End of a lesson today.

Posted in Uncategorized

How I Met The Doctor VIII : “Him and Them part II”

Posted on by arlanadya

The writing mood is here. Keep going!

My first Umra was on October 2003. It was the time when I finally decided to wear jilbab. It had some impacts on few things, including this problem.

I did not know how it worked, but right after I returned, I started receiving few unknown texts from I didn’t know who, some guys asked to be introduced to me from my roommates, and so on. But, there was a distinguish newcomer on my second semester.

Having written these, I don’t intend to remember those men but more to explain where I and the doctor were during these college years and what happened to us. So, after telling about them, I will continue about him.

2nd semester
This man was from other major but often had same class with my major. During first and second semester we had about more than 2 same classes in a week. I did not notice him at all till my roommate which happened to be his classmate, told me there was someone who had been asking her about me.

I didn’t really remember how we finally get introduced. What I remembered most that he was very straight forward.  After the doctor, he was the next one who slipped out a marriage idea to me. It was even weirder for me since he didn’t even know me, at all. Just few months after we knew each other, he suddenly talked about the marriage which I found it quite annoying.

Facing this person, I had been even more to the point. Told him I didn’t have any interest to have close relationship till I finished my study, so he could not expect more.

I refused this one for the same reason like I had with my senior. I was pretty sure, I would never return the feeling to him. There were quite lots of things that I didn’t really keen of him. I disliked some his ways in persuading me. It was pushy. Not good at all. I remembered quarelling with him over some matters. Like one day he insisted to accompany me to fetch the textbooks for my teaching class in other faculty. I refused it and spent almost half an hour to argue with him. I wouldn’t give up since I knew that once I said yes to him, he would ask for another thing. And I won the fought;))

He was there all the time during college, and still tried enough even after we graduated. Had been continously trying to change my answer for 4-5 years, but, I just could not.

Him
We were still fine in early of second semester, but I really didn’t know what happened after that. I believed it must had been something big since I stopped writing on my diary for 5 months. I really can’t tell what was going on since I didn’t write anything. But, I believed it was not good. Maybe that was our biggest first cold war:(

If I was not mistaken, it was April 2004 when I stopped writing and we just resumed our usual conversation near Ramadhan on November. Pretty much,right?

Eventough I didn’t really know what happened back then, I clearly remembered how uneasy it was to be in that state with him.

A bit depressing and frustrating..

Posted in Uncategorized

Heyho,Baby! “Third Meeting”

Posted on by arlanadya

So we finally met again last Wednesday. And you know what, the doctor said it is probably a girl!:D

I have thought for these months that you are a boy,eventough there’s a tiny little part of me that want it to be a girl. I think every woman wants herself a tiny little version of her and so is a man.

The doctor said that you are healthy there, and hopefully happy too;) but, I had an injection since my d dimer result was not so good. Hopefully it will be ok by now. Amin.

Please keep being healthy,good,and happy yaa,little one:*

Btw, we,me and dad have agreed on a name for you. It took a very looonggg discussion and debate until we finally agreed. I really hope you will like it and the name brings you all the good in life. Amin.

I’ll see you later:*

Posted in Uncategorized

Heyho,baby!

Posted on by arlanadya

I have been wondering what kind of mother I would be later. I haven’t been talk about you a lot during these months while other moms must have been writing almost every thing about their baby once they knew their pregnancy.

But, it doesn’t mean that I am less happier than those moms. I am beyond happy that you are here. Especially last few months, I have sensed your presence well since you have been kicking here and there for couple of times. It has been funny, you know;))

You have been verrryyy good to me. You allow me to work well enough, do the houseworks, did my sunnah and Ramadhan fasting, even you help with Syawal fasting. I really hope we can continue to work together nicely like this:D

Me and dad have not been meeting you since last June, and I am really looking forward to meeting you hopefully next week insya Allah. I have done the blood test since the doctor said that I have to do that before meeting him again. You know I am extremely afraid of doctor,hospital,and all the things related to it. Oh, your father is a doctor I know, but to me, he is nothing about a doctor. He is my husband,hehe.
But,since I really want to know how you are doing there, I did the blood test yesterday. Hope everything is fine. Amin.

So, please keep healthy,be good, and see you soon:*♥

Posted in Uncategorized

How I Met The Doctor VII : ” Him and Them part I”

Posted on by arlanadya

We went to different college and different cities, although it was only between Jakarta and Bogor.
We went through a-quite-tough relationship during our college years. There were ons-offs till I lost count. But, one thing for sure, it had always been there.

1st semester
I remembered facing some of ‘them’ during my first semester. But,the most noticeable was my senior. He was my lecturer assistant for Basic Economics. It was not until the last day of the class when I knew he had been paying me some attention.

I was not the class coordinator for the subject but I remembered that he suddenly texted me for the first time asking something for the final test. I just answered it casually even tough I felt it was a bit fishy since I never gave my phone number. It was confirmed that he had something when his third texts on that day had some standardized-attentive words on it then I knew that was a new problem came.

Why problem? I was not good at all on dealing with other’s feeling, remember?

This senior had been very kind even afer the class was done. Insisted on lending me his books for the second semester which I tried to refuse it hard till I finally accepted it since I did not see any other way to stop him. He even found out my home phone number, that my father once went to the same school 29 years before, and some of the things that I had no idea how he could find those. He called quite often on Saturday evening,maybe just checked whether I had a date or not:))

He popped up the question on new years’ eve 2005. So, it had been 1,5 years until he said the words. It was exactly at midnight. But, then, you know my answer right? I had no intention starting any new relationship at all. Not just because of the promise, but I wouldn’t accept anyone if I was not sure that I could return the feeling. They said it might changed as time went by. For me, I believed it would not. I rarely and almost never change my first answer.

The rejection didn’t stop him at all. It did, for some time. It changed his attitude toward me also. I just took it as a risk. But, yet, he came back. He visited me during my KKN, toped-up my phone credit,etc. After he graduated and worked in Jakarta, he texted me and even once made me had dinner with him, and my friends. Yes, it was a hilarious night that six of us dined together at Saras:))

He had been here for let say 6 years at least. Sadly, It could not move me at all. I wish he had his best things in life as I write this. Amin.

Him
Me and him on the 1st semester were pretty good. Good as we talked over the phone and sms quite often. Sometimes it felt like we were still really together, eventough I didn’t know what he had been doing with other girls during those times;))
At that time also, the idea of being married to me was proposed, or let say mentioned.

I remembered that night. As we talked over texts on the second day of Idul Fitri. Oh, Idul Fitri had always been something about him. Some feeling that only can be felt during that time.
We talked casually and then it stopped for about an hour. He did not reply the text. So I thought that was it for the night.

But, suddenly a text came. Not a usual text but more like a simple poem. It silenced me for a moment after reading it. It was just a-two-sentences poem yet it said a lot.
It was so me for being tactless on replying that kind of text. I often decided to reply with some unfunny jokes since I didn’t know what to say. But, at that time, before I replied, he sent another text explaining that was a poem that he intended to put down on his wedding invitation card some day. He had promised it with his former girl friend, either they would be together or end up with someone else, they would print that poem on their wedding invitation. But, it actually should not be revealed until the time came.
If that so, I asked him why he sent it to me then. He answered that the promise had to be broken because of me and he just missed me so much. I was jokingly said that he should send me one, the wedding invitation.

” The wedding won’t be held if you don’t come. Can I married without the bridegroom?”

There he said it.

It even stunned me more. Wedding,he said?

The rest of the conversations were quite long to be explained. He told me that he didn’t want to lose me until five years later when I had done with my promise. A text that was one of my favorite texts from him :

” Except you find somebody else not me. I try to change. I want to be a better person for you. When I think I make it, I’ll ask you back. Just think how to refuse me”.

Hey little girl, I don’t know how later you see your father, but he was that good at words till many times it felt too overwhelming for the plain me.

But,still, even after that I had not changed my mind. I could not be with anyone till I make it to bachelor degree. He understood that fully.

It was true some saying that said words are actually a prayer. 9 years later from that night, the poem was here :

image

It was written on the back of our wedding invitation.

Posted in Uncategorized

How I Met The Doctor VI : “The Doctor’s Followers”

Posted on by arlanadya

I made the promise for me having quieter life after being in a relationship which I considered didn’t suit me at all.

The time before the doctor, I had good excuse to refuse all the offer since I truly had someone who I really liked for years. I expected no one other than that person.But,as my feeling started fading off it became quite hard using it as an excuse.

I’ve never been one who has so many guys after or popular. I was just an average and just nice looking enough during junior high and senior high school. I had some offer during those years but I never took any of it seriously until the doctor came.

Then I didn’t know what happened suddenly soon as I entered college I became quite popular,at least among students of my major. During new students three-days orientation I had few guys approaching me including the senior who protected me from those guys in my group who tried to approach. It took me some time to realize,men only really care to the girl that they like. So,you can’t call it protecting actually since he did that for his own sake:|

I didn’t know how to put the stories during these 4 years. Maybe I will do it according to the semesters. It was pretty funny that I had at least one person came each semester. But it wasn’t the funniest part.

The fact that they didn’t leave for several years,even after being rejected, well, several times, that was amusing and yet confusing me so much.

After the doctor, I didn’t really understand how all those guys could be waiting like he did.

They really did.

Good? Not at all.

Posted in Past learning, The Big Three

20’s

Posted on by arlanadya

image

Found the quote above somewhere between twitter or instagram and could not agree more.
Since my 20’s are soon to be over insya Allah, few days ago I wrote down in my notes the highlights in each year during my 20’s.
Let’s take a look :
21
First job at campus as a lecturer assistant.
22
Surviving KKN at Blanakan,Subang. I called it surviving since I safely returned healthier than the arrival. Gained few kilos.
23
Graduated from Faculty of Agriculture majoring Agribussiness with Honor.
24
– A dream job came true teaching at an islamic school.
– Having the passport stamped. Kuala Lumpur and Singapore checked.
– Dealing with the worst broken heart.
– Hajj portion number completed.
25
– Chosen as one of the most favorite teacher,highest score in english test, a very good times at school.
– Dealing with some personal problems. Some proposal were offered and politely rejected.
26
– Started pursuing for master degree abroad. Fighting so much for europe for some time.
– Went Umra for the second time. This time, another stamp on the passport added. Istanbul, Turkey.
– Resigned from school
– Started over with a life-time sweet,sour,bitter problem♥
27
– Another dream came true : pursuing master degree abroad. It was UPM,Malaysia.
– Learning so much in every way of one life. Realized so many things about life. Might be the best time and place where my personal growth occured. Well, and to be fair, the worst time and place to the body till it suffered the lowest weight I have ever had.
– A wedding preparation and engagement while having LDR between so many places, you named it: Jkt-Timika, KL-Sorong,KL-Jakarta,Jkt-Vietnam,KL-Samarinda,Jkt-Mecca.
28
The most memorable year of my 20’s:
– Graduated with honor from UPM
– Another dream came true once more : went hajj with mum. The greatest,toughest,and saddest journey.
– Well, this one was hard to imagine when it finally really came true : Married to a life-time best friend.
The one who had been here for 10 years,proposed since 9 years before,and kept trying to make it happen no matter what it took to be together.

Beyond grateful. Three great blessings one could have within a year. Master Degree abroad, Hajj, and A dream marriage.

However ..
The losses were equals, then :
– beloved grandma and uncle were taken just within two weeks interval.
– and, this one was and will always be the greatest loss of my life ; My dearest mum went two weeks after Hajj and just two weeks before the wedding. Half of my heart were already gone with her since that day.

Three enormous losses one can endure within a year.

29
After 28, life has been changed pretty much. It has not been easy (at all) but I can say it is not bad at all.
Had our 1st anniversary and is heading for the second while I am writing this, a little present inside the womb kicks softly:)

I can’t say much about the future. But, I will try to be bolder, braver to embrace whatever happen next.

Then, Hello,30:)

Posted in Uncategorized

Complaining,shall we?

Posted on by arlanadya

Some people who know me well enough must have known that I do complaining,quite a lot. I don’t like being uncomfortable,but who does?

But, I am pretty selective to whom I talk my complaints. Mostly, it is le husband or else the diary or this virtual friend. I rarely complaint to my friends.

I feel tired easily recently,might be due to the pregnancy. Oh,please don’t misunderstand this. I am beyond happy about this little one. The problem is that sometimes i feel these people in my surrounding really seem less care that I can’t be as tired as before. 

I thank God that I am still being able to go work quite comfortably,but the houseworks tire me often. I really tried my best to keep up but still as it is getting bigger,it is getting harder too. It is getting more difficult to meet others’ expectation and being okay at the same time.

For.example,about the meals. I really put much effort to arrange the daily menu. Not only once,but thrice a day. I consider when le husband is home, what food my father seem like having for dinner, what to serve when I am teaching till evening, who will eat the leftover (mostly I do) and when to eat it,and so on.

I become very annoyed when I had prepared the meals then suddenly there is one who said that they ate out or already had the dinner. I don’t mind they are eating out at all but I really insist that at least they let me know, so I can prepare as many as people who eat. It saves my energy a lot.

If others just can sleep and rest after they are home, I can’t. Right after I arrived home, I have to take care and prepare for dinner and everything. No matter how tired. Then after the dinner, clean up all the leftover and other tiny little things that need to be done. I don’t have any other option beside doing that. Then after that, I just have to cope up with this ‘sesek’ tummy everytime I feel so tired. 

 

 

 

 

This is the last day of Ramadhan. In the previous years, it had been always exciting because everybody was home,cleaning up the house, it felt so good. This Ramadhan only me and dad are here. I have been cleaning since yesterday and I don’t feel excited at all. I only feel tired. Mbak wi will be absent for three days as usual and it should be ok,but this year I am alone. I don’t mind washing the dishes or else for few days, but it usually we divide the job but it seems that I have to do this alone this time.

My mother’s death brought so many changes in this family. In my life,particularly..