A YPM alumni posted a writing about life in YPM and it triggered more alumni to give their testimony too. I am enjoying YPM’s little reunion on the comment section while keep reflecting and being currently on the down slope of parenting.
Reading those comments make me realize few things.
Not all the students become great/famous pianist. But, all agree in one thing. The result of all the rigorous training done for years are same for everyone :
the good characters stay, Especially for those who reached certain level.
Lower grade in YPM is about building discipline, consistency, resilience, and many kind of internal characters.
Upper grade in YPM (if one is given the chance) is more about displaying years whether those characters have been successfully internalized or not.
Before grade 6, if you don’t pass, you can repeat the year. Starting grade 6, if you don’t pass : out.
The brilliant one goes directly to PK 1. The not so brilliant one (like me) goes to Pra PK. It’s like another second chance of grade 6. If you don’t pass : out.
In PK 1 – PK2, if you don’t pass all or half of the subjects, repeat the year.
PK 3 is the final destination. The end of journey.
They pick 2-3 student to be taken as teacher, if they tick all the list.
Looking back, I think, those who could proceed and survive PK years, are ones who got the characters internalized, more than the skills.
Ones who, in spite being scolded hard weekly, keep coming. Ones who might be not so talented, but keep trying. Ones who keep juggling between task and challenges, they give their all to finish it,no matter the result.
Evening Replass is where we have play in front of others, being criticized openly and bluntly. Twice a week, From 7pm-12 am. It might sound weird, but, I have never seen an empty Repclass room even during school exam, like final test or even UAN. They don’t choose between school or YPM. They embrace both responsabilities equally.
Having/doing/surviving YPM in my formative years, it’s like a ‘shortcut’ to be a functional adult.
The most significant tangible result is nothing written on the paper, but when I look around my peers and realized I was entering 20s fully ready to deal with the most uncertain period of adulthood.
because I am good, but because I have been trained to deal with whatever adult should deal with.
Adults :
Pay their own bills.
Doing multiple roles.
Doing things we don’t like, but we have to.
Having clear goals and know how to achieve it.
Saying no to many things that doesn’t align with the goals, be it job offers or marriage proposals (plurals).
Fully aware that good life comes with price and willing to pay for it.
It’s certainly not because who I am. It’s the works that many people do for me in my formative years and YPM was the huge part of it.
Working and volunteering with the 20s for the past few years, I see it as one way to paying forward for all the hardwork done on me.
Succesful education can be considered by two characteristics : competency and character.
In YPM, they nailed both.
Closing this with one of the most favorite quotes from a book :
“Teachers (and great education) affect eternity. No one can tell where their influences stops”.
The past few days, life gave me huge lessons about few things. Or maybe show me some test to my character.
It showed me how reactive I am. How quick I was jumping into conclusions.
It showed me how much improvement needed regarding my communication skills.
It showed me no matter much I think I know what to do, at certain point, I will be slipped.
It showed me the complexities of raising a child. No matter how much I think I know about my child, there will be more than I don’t know and teach me those I don’t know through certain circumstance that doesn’t make sense.
I feel humiliated, embarrassed, disappointed, stupid, all level of shame from the lowest to the highest. On the other side, I feel confused, worried, defeated, and extremely exhausted. It has been countless session of talking inside the head and tears flowing suddenly. Even when I am currently writing this.
This is actually the real life test to certain thing that I seem to understand during learnng, so it gives me a chance to see how much I understand when it happens in real life, not through others, but first hand experience.
But, this also one of the moments of confirmation how precise Allah’s timing for everything. While facing this lesson, He let me deal with it ‘alone’ to make sure I am the one who get the lesson.
I wrote to the smallest details at the beginning of the year. It happened again this time. Been wondering why it kept delaying while for the past few months it has been consistently on time. It came at the right time to remove some of obligations while dealing with huge commotion.
Other than the emotions mentioned above, there’s one thing that gives me some light :
The amount of courage that helped me get through this. Years spent training this trait through doing hard things and decision making, turned out to be the most useful while dealing with turbulence in life.
Another thing I realized, we, as human, will never be done with ourself until the end. When we think we have done with ourself, then another layer will be peeled, whether we like it or not. Onion peeling event would always sting in the eye.
After many observations and countless volunteering sessions for the pasr few years, I found one similarity between those who always feel they are entitled to something : they have fixed mindset too.
When I realized this, it explains several things that I don’t think make sense and only consider them as, to say it in my own native language, “ngga tau diri”.
Yesterday, I watched a video about Genius Thinking that explains with one model call The integral AQAL model from Ken Wilbur which explains the reason why some people can get the life they want while some others don’t .
Based on the AQAL model, getting the life that you want is a very complex and complicated process. It requires high level thinking from personal level to society level and it starts from the ability to know how to think.
Writing this rings a bell about many things I read and heard in the past. In the entitlement post, I wrote about my daughter of how I considered her to be entitled due to many privileges she had.
I also remembered her language therapist few years ago once said that she had fixed mindset and one of his therapy goals was to train and improve that. At first, I was quite taken back hearing this from someone else, knowing all the daily routines that we’ve been doing for years, one of the goals is to promote growth mindset. Learning things, making her doing her own chores, doing hard things, etc. But, at certain point, it wasn’t enough (yet).
Now, it feels make sense because being entitled is indeed one of the characteristics of a fixed mindset person.
I see some improvements as years go by, Alhamdulilah. But still, I don’t want to take it for granted. I always think we have still a long way to go (this line alone, without I realize, is the way one with growth mindset thinks).
It also rings another bell about this country. There was once a research regarding the PISA result that said more than half of Indonesian kids had fixed mindset and it showed in their learning result.
Our education relies heavily on result, like exam result, and that is the most fixed mindset thing ever. While the base for growth mindset is process and it is what it takes to instill deep learning so they can employ deep thinking. All questions in PISA test requires that level of thinking.
No wonder we are in 78 out of 81.
It rings another bell too observing people in my surroundings. Those I often consider solely as “ngga tau diri”, turns out it’s not just about that, it is the fixed mindset that translates to many things in real life. Their thinking is limited thus their problem solving. They can only perform linear thinking to every problem. If it’s A, then B. Like there’s only one solution to every problem. They take shortcuts in many things in real life to solve their problem due to lack of understanding and thinking. (I remember writing line in previous post about raising onlies).
Naval said in his famous quote : The only true test of intelligence is not IQ, but if you get what you want out of life. There’s two parts of it. First, getting what you want which means you know how to get it. The second one is: wanting the right things, knowing what to want in the first place.
I now know how hard it is.
It explains why those people I consider entitled, their life stays the same and shows no signficant improvements throughout the years. The scary part, if I look back, who they are when they are little and young , they carry it until they get older. Close to no change at all, they are getting older with a bigger problem to deal with.
I currently deal with something that shows the cost of not teaching thinking properly when one is young is too big to pay when they’re old. Literally and figuratively.
This writing alone makes me really reflect on how I raise my daughter.
Am I on the right track?
Do I bark on the wrong tree?
May Allah make it easy and guide us through all the way.
Amin.
(This is also another 4am post that is finished two hours later and triggered by recent certain circumstances that made me realize I have a lot of biases inside of me. But, I still couldn’t help saying, in my native language, “masa gitu aja ga ngerti sih?” while dealing with this kind of people).
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After publishing the writing, I searched few readings in my library and journal. Found an interesting Journal about the correlation between Psychology Entitlement (PE) and luxury brands consumption and fixed mindset. Whoa!
This post and recent events also made me looking back my old post that said :
You can’t do the right thing. It cost you prison sentence.
You can’t do the right thing because it will make you look weird. People will drag you down from doing the right thing.
You can’t do your job properly. You might lose you life.
You can’t be smart and have good heart with pure intentions. You’ll be on the suspect list at the end.
You might have some minor misfortune, but no single law will help you to find the justice. You just let it go and let it slide.
You have to work hard for everything yet still couldn’t afford for the basic things.
You live in a home where your hard work is never properly appreciated, your feelings are never be validated, but there’s almost nothing yoi can do to leave that home, not only because you can’t, but simply because, you won’t, because it’s home.
I can write longer list but pressing the publish button is more important than let it slide into the draft (like many others before).
A relationship with something has never been this complicated.
This one too has been sitting on the draft for weeks.
Been volunteering since 2022, dealing with 20-30s something problems like work, life and love. What I want to pour here is more about the last one.
I once said looking for a life partner is exactly like looking for a job. You have to be actively searching for it. The process is quite similar for both and there are two processes: filtering and selecting.
I found a good discussion in one of forum that said in choosing potential life partner, people, especially women often confuse between filtering and selecting.
Filtering is the surface : look, income, etc. Selecting is the core : values, character, emotional regulation.
Stuff from filtering can change over time. While ones from selecting rarely does.
Many are choosing based on the filter criteria instead of selecting criteria. They’re screwing up the process.
Now, I want to see this from (my) religion perspective.
After so many observations, when it comes to choose someone to settle with, there’s a different order of criteria to be consider for man and woman.
Once again, different order.
For woman to find a man, judge the character first, religion next. Not the other way around.
Setting the bare minimum requirement still needed, it’s filtering the essential. But, it’s unnecessary to go too narrow.
Go deeper instead in selecting criteria. Seek values, observe characters, upbringings, emotional intelligence. One that is worth examining too is spirituality comparability. It’s rare and often overlooked, but, it can become a potential problem later.
Observe the consistency of the good and bad character. Ask yourself can you survive with the bad characters and can you catch up with his good characters?
More religious man with bad characters will make life harder than less religious one with good character. In reality, there are lot of men who prays consistently, memorize Quran heavily, doing religious activities actively outside, but, in the other side, their behavior inside doesn’t reflect all the knowledge, the purpose of salat and application of the Quran.
In Islamic education, adab comes first before knowledge. Building the characters first is more important than stuffing and pushing the knowledge to the child.
Everything seen before marriage will be what’s available during the marriage with very little probability to change.
Change is hard. Nobody could act outside their pattern. Nobody could change someone and will change for someone. Hidayah is priceless.
Choosing a CEO of household should be done more with the brain. He should have the skill and mindset to grow, protect, and provide; safety and security for the employees.
Clear thinking skill is needed for choosing such level of position. Believe what you see more than what you feel.
While for a man, when it comes to find a woman, go according to hadits.
“Abu Huraira reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “A woman is married for four reasons: her property, her status, her beauty, and her religion. Thus, give precedence to one with religion”.
For women, she will be the one who sets the tone and level of how peaceful a home will be. True and utmost peace only comes from one resource, as explained in 13:28. To attain peace, it takes a strong connection to the One who bestows peace.
“those who have faith and whose hearts find peace in the remembrance of God- truly it is in the remembrance of God that hearts find peace”.
You don’t see peace. You feel it.
A woman is also the first madrasah for the children. Teaching, mothering, nurturing is always a heart job first then brain. To do it well, it takes heart that contains peace.
Regarding change, women are more likely to make it than men. Women are more emotional creatures. An environment that gives her safety, physical and emotional security will calm her nervous system. Those can lead to the change of their behavior so they can think clearly about caring for what’s inside.
In the end, again from my own experience, two people will find each other at their level and to survive the relationship, they need to be on the similar frequency, continously. That’s the real hard work of marriage.
During this season of life, the day can be divided into a few roles and shifts during the day.
It starts with quiet and silence in the morning. When the 3 am alarm rings, moved to the living room. It’s when I read, write like now, then followed by the Sunnah prayers and morning Quran.
The loudness of the day starts between five and eight a.m, dealing with motherhood’s tasks and duties. This period is loud and intense. But, this is also when the most important parenting takes place. Between 5-8 am in the morning is my 80/20 principles as a mother. Me as a child was quiet, me as a mother is loud. Whose mother is not loud anyway?
It feels like pushing a button or turning down the volume knob right after school delivery to midday. It’s where I play, do some work, and rest. The little girl always asks when I picked her : “what did you do while I was gone?”. Sometimes the answer could be lengthy, sometimes it could be no more than five words like: “I read and sleep”.
This period of the day is guilt-free. It’s one of the most important periods of the day when I can entertain myself, body, mind, and soul. I go for a morning walk, go jajanan pasar hunting, volunteer, meet with friends/parents, clean the house, read and sunbathe, and then nap. Nap time is important.
Preparing myself to mood-switching after midday where I resume working. Picking up the work phone and start dealing with customers and teams, while going for school pick up followed by after-classes session and dinner preparation. This is like doing multiple jobs at once. Tired, but totally manageable. Whose life is not tired anyway?.
Dinner always done between 5.30-6.30 pm and another period that I am looking forward. Works are all done. Study night with the little girl doesn’t count as work, it is more like a light discussion or checking some of her works.
When the last five times prayer of the day is completed, it is already near time for bed.
Saturday is mostly the loudest weekday during this season. (Any day that requires me to move around is considered a weekday.)
I decided one thing that I didn’t want to do in life when I was 26 : daily commuting and being stuck in one place for hours daily. After doing it for two years, it crushed my body, mind and soul. I didn’t want to move restlessly between day. That was when I understood that I need more than money to live properly. I was far from wealthy but I didn’t want to spend my life being tired and unhappy daily.
Trading stable jobs for tranquility is the price to pay and that was the first time I exercise my audacity to ask kind of life I want (or I didn’t want to be exact).
Everyone looks for peace of mind at a certain point in life. I just decided a bit early.
One of the gains from this kind of life that I really treasure is a chance to do my five times prayer mindfully and peacefully. No rush and I can take it as much or as long as I want (although there are times when it is still as fast as I can). Time and space to exercise the long surahs and verses memorized. The sit and stare after some of the prayers. At my age, any other gains offered but must be traded with such significant gain is no longer interesting.
From few angles, this life might look boring and uninterested. But, from many POVs, I am just privileged and and lucky that life granted me the audacity and go along with my decision.
Life before the London days and after that also plays an important role. London days were milestones when life season gently changed and no willingness to return although the period of living there was over. Life once again granted me the courage and audacity to ask such a thing.
I sometimes wonder where such audacity comes from? Only courage and bravery from genetic and personality? Or it‘s more of pure good fate and destiny? Because, audicity doesn’t stop there. It’s closely related to being resourceful and high agency. I often assume all of these contribute to the complexity of rezeki.
Despite knowing this as an undeniable privilege, maintaining this actually needs one to be sober and sane, not once or twice or sometimes, but all the time. It takes high level of discipline and consistency because it’s really easy to slip away without realized it.
Audacity is not just about courage or bravery, nor destiny. In my native language, audacity should come with “tau diri”.
Cut half of my income and spend only the other half since I was a first jobber in 18.
Number one and two I followed the example set at home. Home matters. May Allah keeps showering the rewards of all the good teaching from and for my mother . Amiin.
Number three, I didn’t really remember how I started but, having clear goals and three big dreams in my 20s helped me giving clarity and purpose what the money earned for.
I also learn that if you can’t be clear about your own goals, it’s likely to be harder to be clear when it comes to other people.
Doing all the those three since my 20s turned out to be a huge advantage in my 40s. Getting older is unavoidable, but what I just realized getting older comfortably needs more hard work when you’re younger. You’ll get what you pay in your 20s for your 40s. Good things compound, so does bad ones. All the habits done daily and regularly over the years during my 20s suddenly feel easy when I turn 40.
I am often being hard on myself because I know myself too well. I am basically and naturally lazy. But I want to live comfortably. If I keep validating my laziness, it will make life harder for me, so there’s no other way to do the opposite.
This also becomes my stand on raising my daughter. I want my daughter have what I have in this part. Although her life is not mine to live, but I wish her well being, physically and mentally in her adulthood, which means the preparation should start early.
Enjoying my 20s thanks to years of training done since my childhood and teenager years, again credit goes to my mother and for some part, my father.
Now, in my 40s, it isn’t time for relax and easy. It means another preparation should be done for the next two decades. May Allah make it easy, may the mind and heart keep being on the track to live peacefully in this world and hereafter. Amiin.
If I could describe what makes me survive these past 13 years, maybe one of the answers is because we have a functional marriage.
This post has been sitting on the draft since last year (I even forgot what year). I only managed to finish that first paragraph above. Nothing came out after that until today (I also didn’t remember today referred to when).
It took a tweet that triggered me to finish it. Not yet published, but just finish it is good enough.
The job division in this household is quite clear from the very beginning. We only have the three of us at home. So, everyone is responsible for certain things at home other than their personal responsibilities without other people involvement in our daily life.
We started literally from zero as I once wrote here.
I was the breadwinner during the first and half years and slowly the doctor took over. Studying full time as residents in the morning while working part time in few hospitals in the evening. Sacrificing less time for more money. That was why we postponed to have a kid during the first years of marriage.
When the little girl came, I took many steps backward towards working although it means less income. But, the baby doesn’t need two parents who give her money. She needs one to earn the money while the other one to give her their time and energy. So, it’s clear who did which.
Up until the tenth year, the job division is still as clear. Not only for the major thing, but also down to the smallest thing. When the doctor cooks, he needs no help in preparing anything. In return, he doesn’t have to think about anything other than producing meal for us, not the cleaning, not even returning bottles of spices used to its rack. It would be my responsibility, and there’s not much argument about that.
It goes the same with money. One will focus on bring in the money while the other will be focused on managing and allocating the resources to the smallest detail.
This marriage has been like an organization which functioned well because the members contributes different skills needed to run it well. One possesses good hard skill while the other one has the soft skills.
Without money, there would be no single dream checked for the past ten years. Yet, money alone without proper management wouldn’t take us anywhere no matter how much the number has been growing since our first year.
When one has to deal with many things outside, the other one takes care everything inside.
The kitchen analogy describes this well. You need different kind of knives when you’re cooking. You can’t cut the meat with the same knife you use to cut the fruit. You can’t cook the soup with same pan you use to grill the steak. This is basically and exactly what a functional marriage looks like.
It might be not an ideal type of household like other typical Indonesian families where additional helps are available to cover some works. But, so far, this works best for us. It’s not easy but it’s totally doable and I am beyond grateful with what I have.
Personally, surviving life together with someone is not easy. I used a meticulous and detailed process to select candidates for someone who had never dated another person.
Pardon my humble brag, but I had plenty of offers during my 20s.
I can’t imagine navigating adulthood alone. Many things that I want in life can not be done alone, and many things are indeed easier with some companies. Single life might be more simple, but together, you’ll be going much further than you can imagine.
As I grow older, I learn to accept many things through continuous broken-hearted sessions. I learned that you can’t have everything, but you can choose what you can tolerate.
I am strong-minded; not much can break me as long as I know the ultimate purpose of accomplishing something. That includes being married.
I sincerely accepted things that happened, the good and the bad, the best and the worst. I wholeheartedly owned all the highs and the lows. This last line is another joy of growing old, I guess. You can just accept anything without so many excuses, because you know, life goes on.
(The third updated draft after another major issue happened).
Last child lives a soft childhood, the prince or princess of the family, especially when they’re different gender from the older siblings. They have more attention and compassion from the surroundings.
Thus, They’re generally entitled. Maybe because they are here when everything is ready. They mostly don’t go through the lower end of the family history.
They’re more close-minded than the other siblings. I think this is related to the entitlement they carry.
They grow to be an adult who thinks it’s all about them and their problem solving skills are mostly one way thinking.
Disclaimer 2 : back to disclaimer 1
While, the first child syndrome, they are the warrior of the family. The second parent to the siblings, one who carries the most burden, expectations, and responsibility. They mostly have ‘rough and hard’ childhood.
In the other hand, they become an adult who is strong, self-reliant, capable, and emotionally more intelligent than other siblings. They’re real life ready since early. They’re mostly the most ‘successful’ in the family, and it’s not only about material things. First child tends to have solutions to every problems.
But, there’s always price to pay. What doesn’t kill you indeed makes you stronger. But, at what cost? The successful fist child seen from the outside paid with the most innerchild wound inside.
Onlies tend to be the combination of last and first child. As a parent of one, balancing between the two has been the homeworks that I have been working on. Raising the little girl with sufficient amount of last child comfortable life for the basics (although what considered basics in her period is way totally different than one in our period). But, in the other side, treat and push her towards the mentality of first child through the daily activities, regular experience, and setting the right expectations.
As a first child, it’s not really hard to train of what I am and have been through. The most difficult part is to understand something that I am not and I didn’t have growing up. Putting some new perspective inside the mind and consider it as nice thing to have too.
Acknowledged that she doesn’t have to go through what I had been going through to become a functional adult. But, not so much too lenient until she became more of dysfunctional last child who can only deal with anything comfortable.
Where’s the middle child syndrome? I don’t really have so much encounters with middle child. But, one thing that I observe from few families with middle child :
Strong parents usually produce the typical first child. While not so strong parents usually raise a strong middle child. Middle child who try to fulfill the absence of traits that are usually own by the first child.
This is aligned with what my psychologist told me. Unconsciously, every child will take some role in the family they’re born into. So, in some scenarios, if the first child doesn’t take the role of the typical, then other child will take that role, in this case the middle child.
Well, this is a personal ranting, not an empirical study. So, feel free to disagree.
Dealing with three times traffic light in few meters after sending the little girl to the school.
Continous sighing of “I am so tired” due to late night out and late sleep. In my dictionary, late means anything done outside after the maghrib prayer.
Regularly punching my aching shoulder and wonder “should 40 feel this old?”. What is the science behind the decreasing energy as decade passed by?
I wrote those lines above while waiting for one of the longest red lights in the city. I resumed this while waiting for the little girl’s math classin the afternoon.
After school delivery, I had an appointment at nine am and was heading there while whining. This Monday is unusually packed from morning till evening.
I stopped by a supermarket along the way. I planned to visit my parents’ house after the appointment, so I picked some traditional snacks and was quite happy with my choices for today: a pair of Lumpur surga, a pair of Dadar unti, a pair of lalampa, and a pair of panada—two pairs of sweet snacks and two pairs of savory ones. It’s Monday and Sunnah fasting day, so those were good selections for Iftar.
Besides snacks for my father, I bought a pack of Santang Honey tangerines for the house assistant who has been staying with us for 29 years, along with the Eid money I had prepared for her. It was a long overdue Eid money. Making time, space, and energy for something that is not really compulsory requires a high level of intentionality, and that is not easy. I already felt so guilty for continuously postponing the visit.
It was great view with blue sky and white clouds from where I sat behind the steering wheel. It makes the heart slightly lighter when the weather is nice and there was an inexplicable feeling that today’s meeting would be a good one.
I have been thinking about this particular matter related to the tiny business since a few years back, but again, there is not enough time, space, and energy to really consider it. Staying within the status quo has been my escape.
But last Ramadan, I still remembered how it went. It was like being struck with lightning. I sat at my dining table and suddenly had an idea. Looking at the maps and texted few possible scenarios in my head. After years of doing nothing, I finally took the first step toward change.
The idea was a bit unusual, but trying wouldn’t hurt. Surprisingly, I got answers, although many were not what I hoped for. A few declined, and one answered with a chance of good news. I set up a meeting, asked many questions, and returned a few times, but something didn’t click. No matter how often I imagined how it would be going, I couldn’t feel certain.
I went back and forth by this option. I kept questioning whether it was just really unfit or just another excuse that had been around for years. The hardest one to beat in life is no one, nothing, but my mental block inside.
I seem to be less courageous as I grow older. Staying wrapped in comfort is indeed addictive.
In between thinking and considering, we visited another option but it was even more unfit.
The idea keeps lingering, until last Saturday, I took my time, driving alone in the morning to drop some equipment and picked my daughter’s bag.
The road was empty so I could drive slowly, hoping to notice something that I have been missed before. I have this certain restrictions that I always set for almost everything that I want. So it makes the options limited and I rarely want to compromise. I’d rather wait.
When I took the u-turn, passed a convenience store, and kept driving slowly on the left, I saw a small banner with a tiny phone number. Unfortunately, I couldn’t take a picture or note it down since it was so small. I was hesitant to return because I still had to be in another two places after this. I need to go through a bit circling once again to get the number.
But, this time, I told myself, if I didn’t, I might regret it. This might be another chance that could work. So, I did
Got the phone number and asked right away. Along the way I started compromising my restrictions to have more options. I captured three more phone numbers and asked right away too.
Not long, all came with answers. The only positive answer came from the one whose number I got with an extra effort. Set up an appointment on Monday.
I almost cancelled today’s meeting due to the low energy since the moment I woke up until the moment I typed the first three lines ranting above. I already thought to send a text that I had to cancel, but, some guts said “just don’t, come on!”.
Usually, I tried to use as much as my logic for everything. But, it was hard to deny the good feeling inside about the meeting. When I arrived, met the couple, saw it with my own eyes, it reminded me of the first time I saw our current home, our place in London, our current business place, the red English garden bench, all the things that I have been looking for and need to wait for a while until I found them.
It felt just right.
The rest of the day was spent by discussing things with the co-owner, texting few other people that came to my mind regarding the matter, and suddenly I feel like finding a new purpose for living. Sounds joking but it’s true.
Other than the technical and non-living things, I always consider the kind of people I deal with. I like the people I met today, and I think they like me too. The deal has been done in less than 24 hours. No matter how convincing it feels, entering a new phase is still frightening. The sign : countless repeated Bismillah over and over again, consciously and unconsciously.
At times like this, my thoughts always return to The One Who Decide all affairs. All the sequences that doesn’t seem make sense, but happened. All the knocked doors seem to be voluntarily closed and only open for the right one. All the little things that send me to the particular place or things has one similarities : it happens so fast.
The waiting has always been worth it.
This Monday also marks the end of the fasting marathon during the past two weeks.. Five days of Qadha, and today was all the three Sunnah fasting altogether: Syawal, Monday sunnah, and the last day of white moon. The hardest fasting is always those are done after Ramadan. Alhamdulillah for the chance to complete it all.
On my mother’s hometown, after completing six days of Syawal, there is this second Eid called Lebaran Ketupat and it is celebrated quite loud too.
We had iftar at our old home in the mall in one of Indonesian restaurants with wide range and good selection of food and traditional snacks, and they just officially got a halal certification! Another good news that made me happy too.
(I don’t really fond of having iftar outside, it’s tiring. But, the little girl’s had a dentist appointment there and it was too close to iftar time. When it comes to iftar, I always crave for Indonesian food. Another restriction set by me for me).
This Monday looks and feels like another Eid. Literally and figuratively.
Taqabbalallahu Minna wa Minkum Shiyamana wa Shiyamakum (May Allah accept our fasting for you and us).
Eid Mubarak!
The clear blue sky of Monday
(Writing about the mundane events of daily life is underrated. This Writer said it well).
A Penny for My Pensieve 