Author: arlanadya

Monday, 15th June 2020 became the first day of the re-opening all non essential store across UK after the official lockdown in last March. People were queuing from early morning to enter Primark and other Oxford Street’s darlings last Monday.

At certain point, I understand the reason behind such thing. Being in a represive state for three months is hard, extremely hard for some people.

Freedom is priceless.

But on the other side, have these three months taught lots of things such we actually dont need too much to live? (Reallyyyy? Asked all the purchase made during lockdown). Managed to survive these three months by doing only the most essential things to survive.

Going outside for doing groceries and daily walk only, once until thrice a week. Daily workout everyday with Daniel and Alex in my bedroom to keep my sanity, daily dose of dramaland friends, and recently, baking becomes something that gives unexplicable calm, spent time with the little girl and the doctor. I have known that home is where I belong the most since 10 years ago when I decided to quit full time job. But this pandemic made it obvious that home is (or should be) the centre of our life. Taking care and investing more energy on it should be something that we prioritized above anything.

It’s where we start and where we will return.

After these three months, personally, I am not really sure that back to the old normal is a good idea. I love the new regulation of not sharing seats with strangers in public transport, I love the idea that school and work could be balanced between doing it from home and on site plus the reduced working hours. I like the absence of morning rush, I like flexibility between schedule, I love keeping safe distance from other people, or maybe in short, it’s just because I love slow and quiet life too much. It might not be suitable for everyone.

I am fully aware about many privileges in my pocket that make surviving this situation well. No money issue eliminated the struggle by 70%. At times when people are losing job, work hard to make ends meet outside, being able to stay at home is precious. No specific mental health issue to deal with thanks to many things nurtured in the past.

Being physically and mentally healthy are priceless.

A message text just came this morning saying that little girl is invited to go back to school from Monday. I am torn between happy and worry. Happy because I think she really needs it already. Worry because she will start being exposed to outsiders which we have no control about many things.

I dont think we could really back to the old situation after this. Just can’t imagine how. Or maybe, not too fast. Instead of excitement, return to the old lifes bring more anxiety. Funny, eh?

In every turn, always wish nothing but Allah’s guidance and protection to walk every path we (choose to) take.

It’s almost impossible to not being overwhelmed watching everything happen in these few past days, not to say the past few months.

The death of George Floyd who made the whole world filled the street and loudly screamed to abolish any forms of racism. Then yesterday, the old case of Shukri Abdi, 12 year old Somalian girl from Manchester who died of drowning because of bullying, and so many other things that put heavy weigh in the heart. The world looks three times more scary after motherhood.

I have known for long the world is scary, even in the early years I once wrote something about that in The World Against (Y)Our Introverted-Child. With this heavy heart, the homeworks for parents are getting harder. It turns out that it’s not enough to not to be racist. But, more than ever, it’s so important to be anti-racist.

Living in a city where we’re part of minorities, it’s such a blessing that until this very second since nine months ago, I have never been in any situations where I am treated unfairly. No matter where I go. So far, this city has been so kind to all of us. But, I have just realized that even London has a moslem mayor.

I am quite certain to say that I am not racist. I dont have any problems about making friends with anyone regardless their religion or race. Honestly, for someone who is always having hard time in dealing with people, I am glad enough if someone considered me as their friend.

But, I am not sure about doing a self-proclaimed that I am anti-racist. I might have been an unconscious racist in certain conditions or things. Then, the homeworks to teach such thing to the little girl is getting harder. You cant teach something that you dont even have no knowledge or experience.

The experience of being a part of minorities becomes one of the most valuable lesson. Things like travelling could help, although not much. Short duration wont make long lasting impact.

Maybe what we need is to be constantly exposed in a setting where differences become common. Deal with any kind of people from any backgrounds considered as something normal. Understand that we might be different in small things like our looks, beliefs, and preference, but on the greater side, we are all the same human who just want to be treated fairly by anyone, and kindness is a universal currency that accepted everywhere.

My heart always stings whenever I am thinking about the future years this little girl will have to deal with.

Found this enlightning video delivered by the most passionate Islamic studies NON MUSLIM scholar which tells the clear definition about non-racist and anti racist.

The first anti-racist person in the whole world turned out to be the best man in the world who is so dear to us, moslem.

I intended to have the word ‘dark’ above. But, let’s keep the hope alive.

As other countries have been easing their lockdown since the curve has flatenned, the most frustrating home country couldn’t help waiting to do the same by releasing ‘new normal package’. The absurd thing is they’re doing this when the curve has nothing close to be flattened, in fact, it keeps soaring. While there are no more tests, no tracing, no self quarantine, basically almost no significant effort to strongly, stubbornly flatten the curve.

While the efforts from the government feel pretty useless, the citizens are not even better. Leisurely going out without the mask, ignoring social distancing, and many more.

When incompetent government meets ignorant citizens, that’s the price we have to pay.

How a country be more screwed than this?

In my opinion, we’re currently watching the result about the absence of some basic skills that supposed to be nurtured and mastered since early childhood :

– self discipline

– empathy

– literacy and numeracy

It surely becomes the big homeworks for the parents of future generation.

arlanadya.wordpress.com

has changed to

apennyformypensieve.wordpress.com

I didnt know that changing the domain address will cause a drastic change to the blog. Any older posts under arlanadya.wordpress.com were unaccessible from search engine.

I thought changing the address wouldn’t make any changes to the contents. I still have no idea how I can export all those old posts to appear in my new domain : apennyformypensieve.wordpress.com.

Rarely have any regrets in things I have done. But this one, I really regretted changing the address without fully knowing the consequences.

I have all my posts with me. But, when it’s searched on the search engine, any old posts under arlanadya would display ‘the author has deleted this site’.

This is so sad.

😭😭😭😭😭

It has been the third month and current situation is getting hard for many people. The battle against the virus slowly turns into the battle against boredom, frustration, and maybe depression. Some hashtags were trending such as #whenthisisover, #aftercorona, etc.

It’s totally understandable. But, sometimes the least that we need during a long battle is expectation. The expectation that this will finish soon, back to the old normal, vaccine will be available, even some more confidence plans like traveling at the end of the year. Hope is surely important. That’s what gives us strength to keep going. But, just like the old saying, hope and expectation always kill.

I think what we really need right now is adaptation and high and higher acceptance.

For someone who get used staying at home from years before by my own choice, I couldn’t say I enjoy current situation a lot, but I found this is not bad at all, as long as we’re healthy and have no issue about providing our basic necessities. I have two measurable things of my own happiness since long : being healthy and have no worry about shopping grocery. When those two met, then I have had enough.

Being healthy has been always in my top prayer item. It was one reason that made me quit full time job ten years ago. Healthy is not about physically healthy, but also the peace inside. Life is surely not all rainbow, but when hard times strike, I find it’s more bearable when I have more power about how to spend my own daily life. The freedom to be able to choose is priceless.

Boredom is rarely an issue because staying at home doesnt make me planless. I have my own daily schedule, something in my head, some writing to read, some time to do light exercise, taking care some stuff at home, and taking care the place I live. With Langit is here, it makes day even easier because I have another important thing to take care of. Being bored rarely happens. Just like the little creature in The Cave said,

Only boring creature gets bored.

One period of daily life that I feel hard to be survived is when menstruation comes. Daily life without salat feels like life with no firm boundaries. It’s confusing and more tiring. Without my other daily schedules, it could be the most frustrating time.

Human connection is important of course. But then, this virus shows which human(s) whom we should build connection the most in the end. The best investment that you can make for somone who really matters is time.

This pandemic brings so many important blessing in disguises for me. Having more of the little girl at home, adequate and proper time to teach five times prayer, even better, to experience her first Ramadan, homeschool her without too much pressure, and a chance to be shown how she much she has improved and done well dealing with current situation. I can’t say how much I am proud of her.

When I looked back, everything I am of now, somehow it returned to one of the biggest investments that my parents did for me, which was those thirteen years I spent doing Piano in Sekolah Musik Yayasan Pendidikan Musik (SM YPM) .

Surviving one non-compulsory thing for such a long time taught so much about persistence, determination, commitment, survival, adaptation, discipline, grit, hard work, in short, all the things to survive any situations in life. It gives me shiver how those thirteen years keep giving more returns in many unexplicable ways, until now.

It’s been around five years when I decided to spare one best slot of the days in the week for one(s) who supported me in every way to survive those years.

Since the beginning of Life in the time of Corona post series, I have said that it’s best to keep in mind that this situation will last longer than we imagine. So, we could make it easier by setting daily schedule, taking care the place we live, making daily and weekly plans, and totally dropping the long term ones. Slowly change what we can do and keep finding something to enjoy more of daily life. With what we have, right where we are.

In the end, everthing happens for a reason. I couldn’t be more grateful to be living in a place with fresh air, nice weather, quiet and calm neighbourhood, good public tranportation, with my ring 1 during this pandemic life.

It turns out to be one of the best things about (Ngga) Enaknya Pindah ke London Bagian I.

London, 17 Ramadan 1441 H.