One of the heartfelt family pictures and the happiest volunteering project this year.
These are my mother’s village in raising us. At least, four of these people in this picture had once sent me to YPM when I was little. These are ones that survived my teenager years regular crankiness during two years I lived alone in grandma’s house without my family. One of my aunt’s son accompanied me to school in Tebet, from Tomang, before heading to his office in Kelapa Gading, by bus, daily. I was suddenly turned into a spoiled brat while living with them. I can list more but let’s stop here.
When I knew they wanted to perform umrah, but seemed uncertain and unclear about the time and process, I couldn’t help being fussy. To realize any dreams and good intentions, once the money is there, it’s important to execute it asap. Unless, the distraction will always win.
So, I started bugging and nagging telling them I would take care everything and they just had to pay.
This is their very first trip abroad. I enjoyed all the hassles it brings. From registering and sending them for their first passport book, choosing the umrah travel and the package to the smallest detail that cater what they wanted, registering for vaccines and visiting the travel office to do fitting and travel kit pick up, managing payments, to countless whatsapp chats in a dedicated group giving reminders, answering questions, and many more for the past four month. I emptied days in my calendar to accompany them.
Being a shadow agent, the travel agent officer put me in the umroh group chat so I can enjoy the trip too. Couldn’t help being so teary for the past few days looking at all the pictures and videos. One of my aunts called from the hotel in Madinah then we cried together on the phone while laughing happily. She called me again after returning saying how impressed she was with the service during the trip and hoping to return soon.
Being involved and in-charge for my mother’s family umroh plan is truly an honor.
May Allah accept all the worship and prayers, repay all their kindness, and add more blessings to them and their family. Amin.
(When I looked back, a huge part of me become agiver, some credit goes to them).
After the first half, Ramadan flew by. I had my period nearing the last 10 days, and once I could resume fasting, a sudden change of routine was on.
The Tarawih trip was a spontaneous decision made right after Iftar on the first day I resumed fasting after the period ended. We usually do tarawih at home together. But, I wasn’t really sure what happened, but the idea suddenly popped into my mind.
Maybe we didn’t have to rush early after school because school was already on holiday. Perhaps I crave something more special on the last 10 days of Ramadan.
I enjoyed the six-day tarawih trip we did. We went to six different mosques, each around 5 km from home. We left after iftar and Maghrib and then drove to the mosque. We once spent iftar outside to get close to the mosque chosen that day. It confirmed that I loved tarawih out but not iftar outside. Iftar out is more tiring than doing twenty rakaat of tarawih.
The first day of Eid was spent doing the essentials from morning to evening, and it was tiring. The second day of the Eid holiday was spent resting at home and catching up on some unfinished work. A rest day is much needed before upcoming appointments on the following day. I have also already resumed fasting for Qadha and Syawal, insya Allah.
Fasting after Ramadan is hard, but postponing it is not a good option either. Many years ago, I tried to finish all the mandatory sunnah fasting before the next period. I feel safer and more peaceful fasting than having days of feasting.
May Allah receive all the Ramadan fasting and worship done, and may it be easier to complete all the following fasting. Amiin.
Welcoming Ramadan with excitement is one thing that haven’t been changed since many years ago. Growing up, Ramadan (not Eid) is the most festive time of the year and I saw how my mom took it really seriously, especially in creating the ambience for Ramadan, the massive cleaning, the meal prep, done at least two months before.
I once thought what’s with the fuss. Should fasting make things simpler? But slowly I realized, all those advance preparations before Ramadan is to make most of the Ramadan to the fullest. Especially when you had to take care a family of five.
The preparations done months before Ramadan allows you to focus on what’s important during Ramadan because you have taken care those stuff that are related to fasting and make it easier and less hassle.
Of course this is not compulsory, but, it’s totally different feeling to pray, to learn when you intentionally set the ambience and the environment to support the rituals. Clean house, fresh bedsheets, praying set, and towels, the special decoration, the specific scent of Ramadan around the home, all the best efforts to welcome the most precious guest of the year.
I might be forty, but, the certain scent of Ramadan at home is still stuck on my mind.
Personally, Ramadan has been an annually precious guest whose presence are always welcomed wholeheartedly and it makes me happy that I always take it seriously.
This year Ramadan mood at home
Ramadan Mubarak for those who observe the Holy Month!
One of the economic principles is actually applicable to travel: Maximizing the utility of goods/things to get maximum benefits with minimum resources.
Maximising the visa before it expires since obtaining it was quite a hassle. Using the particular lane for families with young children while we still can. Low-season travel while we get the chance. And many more excuses I could make up to justify travelling.
We just returned from visiting another Kota M this year (there is a popular Netflix series here called The Setting with Kota M). While the first Kota M is located in Europe, the second one is in Australia.
After spring in Munich, we had a chance to experience another spring in Melbourne.
It was so nice to be in the place where the air is clean.
Cleaned my face after went around and the color of the cotton used to wipe the face didn’t change much, while at home, it always turned black.
Real blue sky in a normal country is surely different from one in another country whose sky is blue oligarchs.
Our itinerary in the city is always between garden and library. Walked around the huge Royal Botanical Gardens for few hours, breathing the fresh air, listening to the forest sound, and my favorite one : sat and stared by the lake. Doing boring things while traveling is always our main itinerary.
We also went to Luna Park and let the girl enjoyed quite few rides. It was hot and loud.
Done with sensory overload, what we need to is full amount of tranquility. So off we went to St. Kilda Beach.
After Three days in Melbourne, several things that really nice after visiting two cities in Australia :
They have the most comfortable transport station to go around the town. Both Sydney and Melbourne have quite massive tram routes where most major landmarks can be reached by tram only. Tram is so convenient. No going up and down the stairs for subway/train. It makes everything feels near. Need to go to a proper beach? One ride 30mins tram away from city. Need to visit art gallery? Few rides stops from central. Need to run by the river or slow morning walk in a proper beautiful garden? Tram will take you there. I am always sold to a place where public transport system is well-designed.
Proper halal good delicious food is easily accessible. Indonesian restaurants are everywhere, they have two best Lanzhou noodles that the rival only matched with the first one we had in Tokyo, and many more halal choices.
People are (so far), properly friendly. No cold face like Korean and few Europeans, and most importantly no translation needed here.
It feels European enough in ambience with Asian taste in tongue.
Clean, fresh air to breathe.
The highlight of this trip was a road trip through Great Ocean Road. We stopped by Torquay Beach, Maits Rest Rain Forest Walk and the famous Twelve Apostles.
Nature trip will never fail to give you wide spectrum of emotions. It’s when the most sophisticated phone couldn’t capture what your eyes see. No words could describe properly to explain the magnificent beauty.
Couldn’t help being half grumpy while dealing with the windy, yet tremendously grateful by the opportunity to roam around the world seeing the nature created by Allah The Almighty.
We stayed a night in Port Campbell in a motel by the ocean. So so beautiful.
We safely returned at ‘home’ after 30hours on the road.
Road trip, in some parts, is indeed exciting. The breathtaking scenery along the way, visiting places that I have never thought I am able to visit. Places that always create constant self talk inside the head and sense of wonder and reminder how enormous this world is beyond my comfortable home.
But, some things behind the scene are ugly.
Like being cautious of the driving rules of another country, which is totally different from where we come from (which rules are never really clear). During travel, I am the anxious one while one in the driver seat has always been the calm one.
In a road trip, both are anxious (😂, now it sounds funny, but in reality, not really) which the only one left who stays calm is a 10 year old in a passenger back seat. My husband is basically an easy going laid back person, unless, when he drives. Driving in unfamiliar country doubles his tension.
Parking is tricky, eating schedule is messy, namaz time is uncertain and food is mostly unhappy (I survived with a banana and greek yoghurt yesterday since I couldn’t take more instant food). The other side of it is tiring for me.
A big applause for the driver for unlocking a new badge of road trip around the world and also, for the little girl on the back for surviving another long ride without complaining and whining. She’s also one of the reasons why we can go places enjoyably and sanely for many years, because we don’t have to deal with any tantrums,
I do really enjoy all the places we stopped by, but being trapped in the car on the road longer than 2 days, it’s not really my cup of tea.
And, unless doing it with this squad, I’d rather pass.
Most of the time, I always choose an accommodation which provides separate bed for kids. It’s important thing to take into account that everyone should sleep comfortably during the period of uncertainty.
I also visited two libraries and four bookstores in Melbourne and I couldn’t help myself buying and shooking my head in disblief : “Perpustakaan negara orang bagus-bagus banget, ya Allah”.
As always, I also did my solo stroll in Melbourne.
After few days here, this city feels and seems like to be a good place to start adulthood. Met Indonesian students everywhere we go, working part time either in restaurants,amusement park, or grocery stores, spent their free schedule to earn some money between courses.
The similarity : the hospitality looks genuine and they look happy doing their work.
In the tiny bussiness we run for the past few years, since 2019, I started hiring students to work with me and keep hiring students only. I want an employee who also pursue his study. I told them I’ll cater their classes schedule, whatever it is, as long as they commit to their work. It’s not a common practice in Indonesia to work while studying, unless you have a pressure to do so.
While I believe earning your own money once you turn 18 or at least 20 is really important for your emotional and mental health. You might still depend on your parents for certain things, but, at least, you don’t have to ask them to top up your phone credit, dine out out or pay your gas. To be a functional adult, you need such basic freedom at least.
Few other important things I notice here:
People in Melbourne walk in a normal pace. No speed walking, no rushing like they chase something. Exactly how they drive, no honking. When they overtake, they do it politely.
They’re Asians at heart. Other than coffee shop, the most full packed restaurants are either Chinese, Korean, or Japanese. Indonesian and Malay one is still full of their own people. Most employees in hospitality are Asians. No wonder they call this city the second home.
This trip feels comfortable because comfort food is reachable. Nasi goreng, sup buntut, iga bakar madu, sate kambing, you name it they have it.
Traveling always gives new insights. The first Kota M we visited this year made me can’t go back to the usual pastry or bread.
The insight gained from this second Kota M already made me searching information and the tuition fee to study in a Melbourne University.
Seven days of pleasant beauty and hospitality finally come to an end.
Let’s meet again for another opportunity, insya Allah. Till then, Melb!
Here’s the highlight : met a koala in wild life. Been to Australia : ✅
What I have been currently practising while waiting for Satuday music lessons.
It’s been a while since I let the little girl alone during the lessons. Let her deal with whatever it is.
Other than being her mom, I have a lot of things that interest me and I am quite eager to try, execute, and pursue it. Having quite some time during her lessons, I searched for a class and found this. Reasonable distance from music school with suitable lesson time.
I slowly moved from not being able to pull the strings properly to shoot quite well on the yellow circle.
I love the feeling of learning new things. Being among kids around my daughter’s age who are more skillful yet it gives me some insight what these kids mostly talk about. I love being taught by them. A girl ask me : “Mau dibantuin?” (“Do you want me to help you?”) when she saw me having difficulty to pull out the arrows. Oh, I hope my daughter grows as kind as her.
There are very few other young adults too. I feel I belong more standing with this bunch than sitting with some parents on the side waiting for the kids.
Archery suits me in many ways. It’s not loud. I don’t need talking much to others. Everyone is only focused on on their own targets.
It is similar to the reason Murakami writes in his memoir about running : “Team sports aren’t my thing. I find it easier to pick something up if I can do it at my own speed. And you don’t need a partner to go running, you don’t need a particular place, like in tennis, just a pair of trainers.”
Core memories have been a famous phrase these days.
When I look back, one of the ingredients of core memories is things done continuously for a certain period during our childhood. Something that we did repeatedly until it is impossible to be forgotten since it engraved in our heart and mind, memorized by our bodies.
Like for me, Ramadan and Eid cleaning are my top core memories. It was intense, done yearly together with my family, and the memories of how the mood of the home changed drastically after the cleaning, were some of the most memorable stuff in the core memories shelf.
Eid cleaning is one that makes you tired but happy.
Since she first started fasting four years ago, tarawih has been the routine my daughter performed for a whole Ramadan, without a fuss.
Personally, fasting for a whole month is easy. But she is doing tarawih for a month; that’s another story. Maybe because, unlike fasting, which is compulsory, tarawih is not. This little girl has been so determined in her fasting and tarawih. She did training while fasting, too. Both PE and swimming in the afternoon without neglecting the tarawih at night. Something that I couldn’t even do when I was at her age. I am beyond grateful for another Ramadan with a 💯 attendance of fasting and Tarawih this year.
I only hope as she grows, the memory of Ramadan (especially at home) will be stored in her core memories shelf. The fasting, the suhoor, the early morning chores (she does lots of chores, too!), the iftar and tarawih, all the joyful things that Ramadan brings; I hope it stays with her for a long time. May she find more meaning, peace, and happiness in all her future Ramadan worship. Amin.
To be healthy to do the whole month fasting and other activities with so much joy, To be blessed with so much kindness received, Enjoying lots of merry things that Ramadan brings. It’s unavoidable to be sad because it’s leaving.
May all of our Ramadan worship be accepted. May all the Palestinians be granted the highest reward, hopefully, sooner than we have been praying for, blessed with absolute freedom, and get everything a thousand times better than what they’ve lost here in Dunya and hereafter. Amin.
For countless times, May Allah grant us a chance to meet another Ramadan in health with a better level of iman. Amin, Amin, Amin ya Allah.
This Ramadan has been the most uncomfortable I have ever experienced in the few past years.
It still gives the usual joyful feeling but it’s been shadowed by several things behind the scene.
Knowing how the Palestinians spent this Ramadan under attack, famine, terror, and it has been five months, masya Allah.
Whenever I read some historical events, like world war, I wondered how life was for other parts of the world which weren’t part of the war. How it felt when you were part of the people who were affected by the war, struggle and suffered, while you knew there were people out there who had bussines as usual and normal ordinary days.
During covid, it felt like we were in this together. But, this time, I felt like we betrayed those people. We enjoyed festive Ramadan safely, happily, peacefully, while those people out there, the mothers, the children suffered greatly from the devils’ continous evilish acts.
I love doing all the worshiping day by day, but, I don’t feel like doing all the usual rituals. I want to capture all of things around the home during Ramadan as usual, but, always end up postpone or even cancel whatever I want to share.
I am currently on my period so I have been absent from fasting for almost a week. Nothing give uneasy feeling in Ramadan other than the period. I feel so isolated. No fasting, no prayers, no iftar, no sahur, no tarawih, I dislike period the most when it is Ramadan.
Halfway through Ramadan and I only write twice. This year Ramadan is joyfully uncomfortable.
Ramadan has always been an intense reflection period personally.
It allows more silence during the day where my mind wanders to many things that I have been going through and how much things have changed.
Comparing the different experiences of Ramadan when I was little and with what my daughter has today is one of them .
Looking back, the kind of Ramadan that I had during childhood was very much outdoor. Subuh at the mosque after sahur with the neighboor friends followed by playing outside before it was time to go to school, riding a bike around the block before iftar, then tarawih prayer at the mosque again after dinner.
While this little girl spent so much of her time indoor. Including the Ramadan. She fasts well and properly already. Wake up sahur easily, no hungry nagging along the day, having iftar eagerly, then tarawih together at home.
Growing up without siblings (and children of her age around the neighborhood) has its own disadvantages indeed. But, it is what it is.
During the fast, she keeps doing her activities as usual including physical training with her coach and soon swimming will resume. At home, she has few chores that she has to do like unloading the dishwasher and put back all the kitchen and eating utensils to where they belong. She also has to make some simple dessert for iftar.
Not only at home, we also totally have different Ramadan experiences at school. I went to a private Islamic school where Ramadan was celebrated loudly and merrily. I really really loved Ramadan vibes at school. It was one of the most wonderful times during my childhood.
For the little girl, she goes to a private general school. Although Islam is still the majority there, there’s no spesific celebration for particular religious events since it’s not a religious school.
The decision to send her to a non-religious school surprised me too, who had planned a long time ago about a school she would attend. But doesn’t life rarely go according to plan? Things happened, life course changed its direction, so we just need to adapt and adjust the plan.
For her to learn about her religion is the top priority for me. So, instead of fully outsourcing the religious education to the school, we take the responsibility. She’s been learning with a private teacher twice weekly at 5.30 am to learn the Quran, fiqh, and many more. For the other days, she is doing it with me.
This is another difference too. While I only learned the Quran at school when there was a lesson in the timetable and once a week with a teacher at home who my parents hired, she learns and reads the Quran every day, without excuse. It’s a compulsory routine to start her day.
No wonder, up until the third grade, she had memorized more surahs than I had ever done in 9 years of attending an Islamic school. This hit me hard. Of course, it is good that my daughter is doing better than me, but, shouldn’t us parents set an example too? Thus, I searched and have been learning with another teacher too since last more than a year ago to catch up with her. How could I correct and teach her when I don’t even know the surahs she memorized at all?
I guess educating a child is quite simple. You don’t have to teach her anything. You have to show and set an example for yourself. Anything, any skills, any values, that we want the child to acquires, do and practice it first ourselves. They will follow, most of the time.
It’s simple that’s why it’s hard. Because, nothing harder than changing and educating yourself.
In the end, whatever different Ramadan experiences she and I have, I hope Ramadan will always be a delightful time of the year, too, for her, as it has always been for me.
Ramadan has always been exciting and spending it fotr the first time at our own home feels incredible.
May this Ramadan bring so much blessing,
May the fasting will be joyful and happy.
All I want for this Ramadan is for the Palestinians to be safe, at ease, and free.
Amin.
Ramadan Mubarak and have a blessed and joyful one!
Too comfy couch in the living room facing the vertical garden, waiting for suhoor time and the slow cooked oxtail soup ready while listening to the rain, 1 Ramadan 1445 H.
We went to a place with winter weather without any heater for this holiday.
Dieng was chosen thanks to countless reels that promote this place and it successfully brainwashed me to arrange a trip here.
Other reason is to to balance the city trips throughout this year and last one is to let both spoiled girls (me and my daughter) experience less comfortable situations and see different things out there.
In spite of lack of facilities here and there, maybe due to its geographical location, but, the hospitality we received from the locals we met here was pleasing.
Few that make a trip called acceptable : clean bathroom, good food is easily accessible, feel safe to go around, and proper internet connection.
I can tolerate washing dishes with freezing water, no refrigerator is available, less comfortable ride and bumpy road, cold piercing weather that makes us stay inside with three layers of clothes and socks to stay warm, last day in freezing weather without water, all the attractions that require us to pay no matter how ‘nothing to see’ they are, but, it’s okay. The tickets were totally affordable.
We only had two main itineraries during the stay. Sunrise in Sikunir and Mount Prau Hiking.
We climbed Sikunir on the second day and left our cabin house as early as 4am. It was freezing cold and quite tough when you traveled with a 9 year old.
But, the view up there was totally worth it.
On the third day, we climbed Mount Prau. I didn’t expect anything at first. But, along the way, we reached the first stop, then continued to the second one, then the third one till we finally reached the summit.
Mount Prau is considered as one of the beginner choices and I think it fits someone who has never experienced mountain climbing before. We departed from Dieng basecamp which is considered as the easiest route.
For someone who lived most of the childhood to adolesence dealing with genetically severe asthma, I climbed leisurely and happily, back and forth. We spent six hours climbing up and back down.
One thing about nature trip, if it’s done with the right group (actually, whatever trip is only good when you go with the right companions), it’s the most mindful trip one could have. We can’t rush, especially when we travel with a kid, we couldn’t be disappointed much, the focus is only to get to the next stop, and whatever view we get along the way, it’s nothing but beautiful.
I love the silence during the 8km of walk. The view of blue sky, white clouds, and fog out there. The each step taken in the quiet forest.
Kind of trip that makes you really tired but happy and realize how tiny we are in this enormous world.
Doing daily exercise, no zero day, wherever I have been, regular morning walk, for the last four years, show its benefits during this climb.
This is such a personal huge milestone in this decade.
But, that wasn’t only about me. There is a 9yo who also reached the summit with her own two legs for the first time. We did several hiking too before when we visited Bajo and camping, but, she received a lot of help back then.
Several comments we heard a long the way :
“Wow, she’s so cool”. “How old is she?” “She went up to the summit? Amazing!”
Two climbs in two days for a nine year old is not a small feat indeed. She whined a lot, which is normal. She complained so much, which is more normal. She said she was exhausted and being grumpy, which is nothing but normal.
The parents who brought her to such trip and ‘enjoyed’ six hours of intense motivational coaching and mood lifting? Maybe that was the only one which was not normal.
But, enjoying such thing and left her behind is not an option. We’re suffering together is the only way to go.
Raising her, we never choose easy, and hopefully will never be, as much as we could.
She might not be impressed a lot about today, but I believe, her mind and body will keep score.
Life won’t get any easier, not always about fancy hotel and pool or beautiful city, but, we have to push through. We always finish what we have started, no matter how hard it is. I hope this trip teach her that.
Easier said and written than done.
Overall, Dieng is beautiful, cold, and worth the long road trip by train, car, and jeep, long hikes to enjoy the beautiful scenery in the highest village in Central Java.
In Dieng, we stayed in a modest cabin house without any heater in 10-15 degree. No proper hotel chain available in Dieng. Some good policy from the local government. So all the accommodation, restaurants here are owned and run by locals. No fancy coffee shops is seen here. No English speaking people heard except some few snobs from Menteng Dalem.
The scenery here is one of the places in Java Island that suits our tourism tagline : Wonderful Indonesia.
After Komodo-Labuan Bajo trip four years ago, this trip is another quite impressive domestic travel on the list.
A Penny for My Pensieve 