Posted in Places, Thoughts, Travel

Tentang Seoul : (Tidak) Seramah Senyum Oppa di Drama

Sedikit uneg-uneg tentang Seoul.

Membandingkan Seoul dengan kota besar lain yang dikunjungi tahun-tahun sebelumnya adalah sesuatu hal yang tidak bisa dihindari. Dan hasilnya seperti empat buku tetralogi Ilana Tan yang menjadi tema trip ini, Summer in Seoul resmi menjadi buku dan trip yang paling kurang disukai dibandingkan yang lain.

Banyak kenyataan di lapangan selama 6 hari ini yang buat kami merasa sedikit tidak nyaman, tapi wajar. Lagi bertamu ke rumah orang lain. Tapi lagi-lagi, karena punya pembanding, jadi tolak ukur kenyamanannya seperti yang dirasakan di kota lain.

Soal makanan ngga seburuk itu tapi juga ngga semudah itu. Tiga tempat halal yang kami coba enak semua meskipun dengan harga yang buat kita yaa mahal. Soal tiga restoran akan dibahas lain kali.

Uneg-uneg ini lebih ke tentang orang-orangnya.

Baru di Seoul ini, bawa Langit ngga berdampak signifikan dalam hal-hal sederhana seperti dapet duduk di bis atau jadi ice breaker with stranger. Hampir tiap kali kami naik bis, jarang sekali ada yang menawarkan tempat duduk seperti di Paris, London, apalagi Tokyo. Ini bukannya maksudnya minta juga ya, tapi membandingkan tingkat ‘kepedulian’. Awal-awal agak kaget juga tapi lama-lama ya udah. Berdiri pun ga papa.

Bukan sekedar tentang menawarkan tempat duduk, tapi orang-orangnya jauh dari ramah. Kami yang biasanya semangat banget naik bis, di Seoul ini jadi insecure. Cara orang-orang ngeliat itu entah apa ya definisinya, tapi jauh dari kata ramah dan nerima. Bahkan di bis kalo ada tempat duduk dua dan saya milih duduk di satu yang kosong sambil pangku Langit, mereka ngga terlihat suka dan terganggu. Agak bingung sih. Entah apa karena saya pake jilbab atau memang terganggu dengan anak kecil.

Hal ini bukan cuma di anak mudanya, orangtuanya pun seperti itu. Cara mereka melihat kita itu bukan seperti yang pengen nyapa tapi kaya lagi mengamati aja dan itu kadang ngga nyaman sekali. Ngga tau dengan pengalaman orang lain gimana ya.

Bahkan Paris yang saya pikir lebih tidak ramah, karena banyaknya orang yang bilang gitu, sangat jauh lebih ramah dibandingkan Seoul. Nenek-neneknya yang selalu ajak main cilukba, petugas yang cukup ramah dsb. Setidaknya gini deh, liat saya tatapan mungkin agak mendelik, tapi begitu liat Langit, senyum hampir selalu cair. Sesuatu yang di Seoul jarang sekali kita rasain. Beberapa kali bahkan suka nengok ke dalem strollernya Langit kaya buat ngecek ni apaan. Trus ngeliatin saya/Pak Dokter lagi. Tanpa ekspresi yang berniat senyum atau apa. It feels like we annoy them quite much.

Penjual-penjualnya pun juga sebagian besar jauh dari ramah. Bahkan ada sekali yang kita pengen banget beli karena barangnya bagus dan harganya masuk akal, ahgassi penjualnya dengan terang-terangan nunjukin gesture kalo dia ngga mau kita beli apapun. Biarpun ada label harganya. Agak aneh memang.

Di playgroundnya pun anak-anaknya pun ngga setertib anak-anak Jepang. Kalo di playground Tokyo anak-anaknya malah nyuruh Langit maju duluan, di Seoul Forest misalnya, justru dia kebanyakan diselak. Bahkan sama orangtuanya. Waktu itu kami biarin Langit antri sendiri.

Tapi lagi, untuk bilang sepenuhnya ngga ramah pun juga ngga adil. Waktu pertama kali dateng, kita bayar tiga tiket buat naik airport transfer. Waktu dicek sama petugasnya di bis mereka marah kenapa Langit juga disuruh bayar. Tanpa basa basi, supirnya langsung ngeluarin uang 8000 won dari dompetnya sendiri buat ganti harga tiket Langit. Kita udah tolak tapi dia tetep maksa ngasih. Jadi kita ambil. (Alhamdulillah..).

Beberapa ahjumma dan ahjussi di Insadong, Gwangjang Market, dan rumah makan halal juga nunjukin kebaikan dengan Langit yang selalu dapet sesuatu. Tempat pinsil gratis, crackers, sampe es krim setelah makan. We’re grateful for them. Tapi memang levelnya cukup jauh dibandingkan kota lain. Jauh sekali dari Tokyo yang saya sampe binggung kok bisa ya satu negara orang-orangnya (yang kita temuin dan ada kontak) sebaik itu sama orang asing. Ketika nolong tuh beneran sampe tuntas. Bahkan ketika mereka pun ngga ngerti bahasa Inggris.

Lorong-lorong kecil Seoul pun tidak semenyenangkan dan seteratur Tokyo. Efek bagusnya, lebih aman buat dompet. Tokyo dengan toko di jalan-jalan kecil yang bahkan di tempat yang bukan buat turis itu bahaya sekali. Barang yang kita pikir ngga perlu bisa mereka buat jadi perlu dan harus beli saking lucunya.

Balik ke Seoul.

Soal bersihnya pun masih kalah ya. Masih banyak orang ngeludah juga biarpun jarang. WC pun ngga sekering, sewangi dan sebersih Tokyo. Selain itu yang paling penting, wcnya persis wc eropa aja. Ngga ada tombol-tombol canggih yang bisa pakai air kaya di Tokyo. Saya selalu bawa botol Aqua kosong.

Jelas pendapat ini sangat subyektif. Mungkin kasus saya hanya sebagian kecil aja. Kaya kasus saya dan Paris yang menyenangkan. Mungkin sebenarnya memang kami aja yang kurang cocok dengan Seoul. Hal lain juga mungkin karena faktor bahasa. Tapi, secara keseluruhan memang ramah dan menyenangkan bukan kata yang tepat untuk menggambarkan orang korea secara general.

Keputusan untuk tinggal hanya lima hari di Seoul ternyata tepat sekali. Ternyata oppa tidak seramah di drama.

Posted in Places, Travel

The Loveliest Day in Seoul

After four days, yesterday was the most enjoyable day in this city. We got off early to go to Namsan Tower and it turned a visit with hiking which I disliked. But, after arrived at top, it paid off. Enjoyed the view of Seoul from above.

We continued to Itaewon. This is a moslem friendly area where almost restaurants put halal sign on their banner. We stopped by at one of the most reviewed one then went to Seoul Central Mosque for prayer.

Gangnam was the next destination. There’s nothing much to see there but we stopped by Starfield Coex Library. At the end of the day, we visited Seoul Forest. It is truly large forest between those big and tall buildings. I am so envy with these cities☹.

It was the first time we stayed late. It was a lovely day for those beautiful sceneries and good food with reasonable price.

Posted in Places, Travel

Another Day in Seoul

It took us longer to feel excited about this city. Other than few ‘less than Tokyo’ mentioned before, two that we miss the most are playground and ice cream.

Until the third day, the number of ice cream Langit finished is zero. So does playground session.

We decided to put Seoul Children’s Grand Park earlier because of this. So, after a visit to Namdaemun Market and Myeongdong, we went there.

It was quite nice one. Better because it’s free entry. Large park with picnic spots, proper playground, mini zoo, and small theme park with major ridings in small size like carousel and its friends.

Food court, mini market restaurant, and some small stallz like cotton candy and ice coffee are available. Doing some walk would be nice too while watching colorful beautiful spring colors.

So far, it’s one of the best spots in our itinerary. Or maybe because it’s one that suits us the most.

Posted in Places, Travel

Hello From Seoul

How’s Seoul so far?

Hm, slightly less than Tokyo in everything except their excellent bus service. No subway hassles.

The people are less friendly and helpful.

The attractions are less interesting and well-maintained.

The rare playground.

The map navigation is quite bad.

The food is less mouth-watering (for us).

It feels like having a less mature Tokyo.

And if I may say, Seoul is so girly. When it is a gender, it’s obviously a girl.

Cheonggyechong Stream
Insadong

Changdeokdung Palace
Gyeongbukdong Palace (view from the bus)

We also visited Bukchon Hanok Village but no proper pictures available because we were busy climbing and finding the way to the only halal food in that area.

Below are : The famous Yeuido Hangang Park

But still, been playing in dramaland for nineteen years, it’s nice to finally able to live a little part of the life from those characters on screen such as able to say ‘Anneyong Haseyo’ and ‘Khamsa Hamnida’ with the right tone to its people.

Posted in Travel

Naik Garuda Lewat Terminal Tiga (Domestik&Internasional)

Setelah 19 tahun lebih tidak menggunakan Garuda, baru di tahun ini ada kesempatan lagi naik Garuda. Alasannya pas naik tahun 2000 trauma. Selain turbulensi parah, landing take offnya ngga enak, pelayanan juga ngga segitu impresifnya

Kembalinya ke Garuda ini jelas ada pemicu yang kuat, tiket murah ke tujuan yang bukan krusial. Paling ngga buat saya. Tiket ke Bajo dan Korea semua didapat ketika GoTF 2018. Satu kerja sama dengan CIMB, satunya dengan BNI. Dua-duanya harganya cukup oke jika dibandingkan dengan maskapai lain. Ke Bajo bisa naik Lion, Batik atau Citilink, naik Garuda jelas lebih enak. Apalagi dengan harga GoTF kemarin.

Buat Seoul, sebenarnya tiket sudah beberapa kali dicari. Dulu pernah liat SQ yang menurut saya buat level SQ oke banget, cuma sayang buat ukuran jarak 7 jam penerbangan musti transit segala. Makanya ngga dibeli. Setelahnya beberapa kali pernah cek harga dengan maskapai lain lebih rendah, tapi tetap ngga dibeli juga dengan alesan yang sama, pakai transit. Kalo dulu masih suka nawar dengan harga sebagai kompromi, abis ngerasain pas ke UK dengan 2 kali transit yang melelahkan, kalo jarak pendek seperti Asia Timur dan Australia, udah paling bener adalah cari yang penerbangan langsung (dan murah tentunya).

Sebenarnya murah mahal itu tergantung value for money ya. Dengan harga yang sama, naik satu maskapai biss berarti mahal atau murah. Dan untuk tau mahal atau murah juga perlu tau berapa harga standarnya. Untuk Seoul, Garuda ini dengan harga yang saya dapat dan apa yang saya terima, udah cukup oke.

Terminal 3 domestik secara aura lebih humble dibanding internasional. Hal yang jelas sama adalah dua duanya perlu cukup waktu untuk jalan antara setelah cek in bagasi (dan imigrasi) ke gate yang ditentukan. Ada sih mobil, tapi tetap harus nunggu dan antri juga. Jadi, kalo pesawatnya berangkat dari terminal 3, jangan pernah dateng mepet. Pelan-pelan semua penerbangan internasional akan berangkat dari terminal 3 katanya.

Antara sedih dan senang karena saya suka simplenya terminal dua. Hawa tua dan sederhananya. Cuma memang begitu dibandingkan sama terminal 3, dia jadi terlihat lusuh, hehehe. Di satu sisi juga senang karena ya ini seharusnya wajah bandara utama dari ibukota Negara. Belum sekeren Changi, tapi setidaknya bisa dibandingkan dengan KLIA. Akhirnya.

Tenants di terminal intermasionalnya pun cukup oke buat saya. Setelah imigrasi akan ketemu sama Bally, Aigner, Longchamp, TUMI, cukup oke dan masih ada ruang buat peningkatan. Satu-satunya memang masalah jarak antar gate ke gate yang bisa dianggap sebagai olahraga. Apalagi kalo dateng mepet dan ngga delay. Selamat menikmati.

Waktu ke Seoul, kami dapat di gate 1 yang berarti adalah gate paling ujung sekali. Sebelummya kami sempet nunggu di lounge dulu yang ada gate 7. Kalo di terminal 2 antara gate 1-5 cuma perlu waktu 10 menit maksimal dengan kecepatan jalan normal, dari gate 7 ke 1 di terminal 3 perlu waktu hampir 2,5 kali lipatnya. Dan perubahan aura itu terjadi setelah gate, saya lupa antara 6 ke 5 atai 4 ke 3 ya.

Dibandingkan gate 10 sampai 6 (atau 3), aura gate 1 dan 2 kembali sederhana dibandingkan gate angka besar. Dari aura luxurious begitu masuk ke gate 1 dan 2 auranya jadi kaya low cost yang rapi dan sederhana. Aura high endnya berubah drastis.

Oya, di area keberangkatan yang internasional ada stroller yang bisa disewa dan dipakai sampe gate keberangkatan. Waktu itu saya pinjam sebelum gate 7 di informasi. Bisa langsung pake ngga perlu apa-apa. Playground anak yang bagus ada di gate 8 dan ada lagi yang lebih sederhana di gate 6. Lumayan buat nunggu.

Sedikit informasi ini semoga bisa membantu kalo ada yang sedang cari tahu😊

Posted in Life happens, Places, Travel

The Last Ilana Tan’s Trip : (Early) Summer in Seoul

At first, I didn’t have any intention to have trips based on Ilana Tan’s tetralogy. I started reading Ilana Tan’s tetralogy in 2009 and Summer in Seoul was the first one, the first one to be published too. I was captivated by the book. The plot is clear, enjoyable light reading and it’s something that you can repeat even after so many times. Summer in Seoul followed by Autumn in Paris, Winter in Tokyo and last one was Spring in London.

When Autumn in Paris took place in October 2016, I had no idea, I would do this four season trip. But then, life has been kind and full of surprises (good and bad) after all these times. Six months from Autumn in Paris, Spring in London granted in April 2017. It was quite surreal when I looked back how we made it to the second trip within six months. Then, after having those two, the idea of having all four came. Winter in Tokyo accomplished in early March 2018. And finally, Summer in Seoul in late April 2019.

I have been a kdrama fan for nineteen years. Surprisingly, my first time dramas were seasons related too. Autumn in My Heart (2000), Winter Sonata (2002), and Summer Scent (2003), were three of my first memorable shows from dramaland. Although it’s been a long time playing in dramaland, but visiting Seoul has never crossed my mind. The want has never been there.

Until Ilana Tan’s three previous trips accomplished. The only one left is this one and I think it would be nice having the last one as a closing. Also, following the golden rule that my late mom told me, “Finish what you have started”. Although this one sounds more like an excuse to go on another trip, but, yeah, Summer in Seoul trip planning began.

As usual, it commenced from ticket searching. Ticket searching is one of my most favorite parts in traveling. It feels like activating all my brain part and its been always testing the patience. My benchmark of ticket price is quite low. The standard from Winter in Tokyo ticket price made me set the same standard for Seoul. It should be a full board airline too.

Thus, whenever I am doing ticket searching, waiting is compulsory. The right time with the right price came eight months ago. So far, it’s the longest interval between ticket purchasing and the real trip. But, based on destination criteria, trip duration, and budget allowed, the price found was reasonable.

Summer in Seoul is indeed the lowest expectation compared to other three previous trips. For the first time too I only chose to stay for five days, while usually it’s been always seven full days. The main reason is : we tried Korean Food few times and it hasn’t suited our taste yet. Rarely fit to our liking. So, five days would be enough. Hopefully.

To dramaland to meet oppa and ahjussi we go!

Posted in Travel, Visa

Mengurus Visa Korea 2019 (dan Mengecek Progres Aplikasinya)

Satu lagi dari Mengurus Visa Series😁.

Setelah mengurus Visa Schengen di TLS Contact, Visa UK di VFSVisa Jepang di JVAC, tahun ini giliran visa Korea di Kedubes Korea.

Sementara tiga visa sebelumnya sudah melalui agen resmi yang ditunjuk, untuk visa Korea, sampai tulisan ini dibuat masih diurus melalui Kedubes Korea Selatan di Jalan Gatot Subroto. Persisnya sebelum RS Medistra.

Meskipun ngga sesimpel visa Jepang, visa Korea tingkat keribetannya masih bisa dikerjakan dengan hati senang. Jumlah aplikasi cukup 5 halaman dengan pertanyaan yang tidak merepotkan. Persyaratan juga cukup mudah dan standar, seperti :

1. Paspor yang masih berlaku minimal 8 bulan.

2. Fotokopi paspor halaman utama.

3. Fotokopi paspor yang berisi visa negara-negara OECD yang sudah pernah dikunjungi. Daftar negara OECD bisa dicari sendiri. Kasus saya,saya punya tiga visa negara OECD yang sudah pernah dikunjungi yaitu Prancis, Inggris, dan Jepang. Jadi halaman paspor yang terdapat visa Schengen, UK, dan Jepang saya lampirkan. Negara lain selain itu ngga perlu.

4. Formulir aplikasi yang bisa di download melalui situs overseas.mofa.go.kr. Karena saya baru pertama kali, jadi pilih form yang single entry.

5. Fotokopi kartu keluarga karena pergi sekeluarga.

6. Bukti keuangan. Seperti biasa, kami ngga melampirkan slip gaji. Hanya fotokopi rekening tabungan 3 bulan terakhir dan SPT. Baru visa Korea ini yang spesifik minta SPT. Saya sempat baca gimana kalo ngga melampirlan SPT, ada yang nulis harus melampirkan surat keterangan tidak punya SPT. Malah jadi ribet.

Bukan ngga mau melampirkan, tapi yang tahun ini pada saat visa mau disubmit belum selesai. Kalo nunggu selesai agak mepet waktunya karena paspor Pak Dokter mau dipake. Jadi akhirnya melampirkan SPT tahun lalu.

7. Surat keterangan kerja dalam bahasa Inggris. Untuk ini kami melampirkan SIP dan surat tugas Pak Dokter yang sudah dilengkapi translasinya. Waktu di loket petugasnya bilang ini sebenarnya harus dilengkapi sama surat pernyataan dari direktur rs yang menyatakan bahwa X adalah benar karyawan RS Y bertujuan untuk mengajukan visa Korea dalam rangka … bersama ….. pada tanggal … sampai … . Seperti yang saya ajukan sebelumnya ke tempat saya kerja di visa Schengen dan UK.

Berhubung kali ini kita pengen lebih simple, jadi supaya ngga perlu minta surat ini itu (dan ketauan mau pergi) jadi hanya melampirkan dokumen tersebut. Kata petugasnya, “Sekarang saya kasih dispensasi ya, lain kali harus pake”. Beginner’s luck. Alhamdulillah. Kemungkinan lain, bisa jadi karena di paspor juga udah tercantum tiga visa negara OECD, jadi dianggap sudah pernah lolos visa yang lebih ketat.

Udah cuma itu aja. Saya lampirin bukti booking tiket dan hotel tapi semua dikembalikan. Jadi TIDAK PERLU booking tiket dan hotel dulu buat apply visa korea.

Oya, karena kami pergi bertiga, semua dokumen di atas dibuat tiga rangkap ya. Semua ada di aplikasi masing-masing paspor.

——————————————–

Untuk submit aplikasi visa Korea ini ngga perlu janjian tanggal tertentu kaya tiga visa sebelumnya. Bisa langsung dateng, TAPI, harus perhatikan jamnya. Untuk submit aplikasi hanya bisa di hari Senin-Jumat jam 09.30-11.30 dan untuk pengambilan di jam 13.30-16.00. Lewat dari itu ngga bisa.

Seperti biasa, ngga ada visa tanpa drama. Keputusan-keputusan kecil seperti pilih jalan yang mana bisa menyebabkan yang tadinya ngga telat jadi nyaris telat. Jam 11.15 masih menghadapi macetnya Gatsu karena milih ngga naik tol cuma karena liat antrian pas masuknya panjang. Ternyata setelahnya lancar. Akhirnya travel agen tunggal yang urus visa turun dari mobil dan naik ke jembatan penyebrangan jalan kaki sampe ke lokasi. Sampe di gerbang satpam jam 11.20. Udah ngos-ngosan. Oya, kalo bawa mobil, ngga bisa parkir di halaman kedubesnya ya. Kami parkirnya di RS Medistra.

Satpamnya masih nanya ke temennya ini jam berapa, karena udah mepet akhirnya disuruh masuk dulu ke dalem buat ambil nomor antrian. Setelahnya baru keluar lagi buat bayar.

Jadi, alur normalnya adalah ketika sampai ke kedubes Korea, yang pertama dilakukan adalah melakukan pembayaran ke KEB Bank Hana yang ada di depan gerbang untuk loket submisi aplikasi. Bayarnya harus cash ya.

HARGA TERBARU VISA KOREA SINGLE ENTRY 2019 : Rp 592.000.

Udah naik 30 ribuan dari sebelumnya.

Sampai di banknya tinggal bilang ke satpam mau bayar visa,dikasih nomer antrian yang waktu itu sama sekali ngga antri, dengan tellernya tinggal bilang bayar visa buat single entry/multiple tergantung visanya. Bayar tunai setelahnya dikasih stiker kecil kaya stamp supermarket yang buat dikumpulin dapet piring itu lho. Cuma besar sedikit. Karena apply buat tiga aplikasi, bayarnya dikali tiga dan dapetnya juga tiga stiker.

Selesai semua pembayaran kembali ke gerbang masuk dan ruang submisi. Tunggu sampai nomer antrian dipanggil. Kalo apply visa melalui agen, pengecekan berkasnya bisa sambil duduk depan petugasnya, di Kedubes Korea masih gaya lama yang kaya beli karcis kereta api. Sebenernya ngga masalah kalo dokumen sudah lengkap semua. Ngga akan lama. Tapi kalo ada yang kurang itu, satu nomer bisa jadi lama banget. Apalagi kalo dalam satu nomer antrian itu submit sampai beberapa aplikasi. Selesai dicek dan semua aman, dikasih lembar putih tanda terima buat pengambilan. Selesai deh.

Visa single entry selesai dalam 6 hari kerja sedangkan multiple entry 1 hari kerja. Sambil nunggu bisa cek progress aplikasi kita via Korean Visa portal di http://www.visa.go.kr.

Di portal ini, karena kita ngga ngerti Han-Geul, di pojok kanan atas bisa pilih ‘English’ lalu nanti di sebelah kiri ada tulisan ‘Check Application Status’.

Nanti akan keluar kolom-kolom.

Pilih yang passport number (bukan application number) : isi nomor paspor TANPA spasi.

English Name : isi dengan NAMA BELAKANG baru NAMA DEPAN.

Tempat tanggal lahir tinggal pilih di kalendarnya.

Klik search baru nanti keluar statusnya apakah masih ‘under review’ atau seperti punya kami di hari kerja ke lima statusnya berubah jadi ‘approved’.

Di lembar putih untuk pengambilan yang dikasih petugas setelah kita submit aplikasi, ada tanggal minimal pengambilan. Kita tidak bisa ambil sebelum tanggal tersebut meskipun di portalnya sudah tertulis ‘approved’. Jadi, perhatikan juga tanggal di lembar putih untuk pengambilannya kalo mau ambil paspornya. Ngga akan dilayani kalo kita ambil sebelum tanggal yang tercantum.

Pengambilan paspor hanya bisa dilakukan siang hari jam 14.00-16.00. Ada yang bilang dari jam 13.30, tapi di hari saya ambil loketnya bahkan baru buka jam 14.15. Lokasi pengambilan sama persis dengan submisi aplikasi.

Kalo pas apply pake nomer antrian, pengambilan sistemnya menaruh kertas putih bukti pengambilan di keranjang merah. Tinggal nunggu dipanggil secara manual. Pake suara manusia. Suka ngga kedengeran apalagi kalo rame dan berisik kaya pas saya ambil. Petugasnya pun jadi sering mengulang-ulang manggil. Kalo satpam di bank biasanya bantu manggil ulang kalo ada nomer yang dipanggil ngga dateng-dateng, satpam di kedutaan ini cuma duduk dan memantau keadaan. Mustinya sih, bisa lebih diberdayakan ya atau kalo ngga petugasnya dilengkapi dengan pengeras suara.

Tapi,selama visanya dikabulkan, ya sudahlah ya😁

Semoga membantu!

Posted in Maternité, Thoughts

Teaching Patience to Find The Right One and Doing The Right Thing

Impatient is my middle name when it comes to deal with (certain) small things. I always want to do it as soon as possible. Like finishing all the chores before lazying around, unpack the luggage until it’s safely restored to its place right after arrived home from travelling (even after 17 hours flight), love rushing things to get them done as soon as possible. But, funnily, it’s not applicable for doing monthly report. I don’t know why for this one, procrastinate has always been chosen.

Being impatient also becomes my strength and weakness in parenting. Thanks to this trait, I always left my house tidily before going out every morning. No dishes left on the sink. Langit could never leave home with an empty stomach and unbathed, even when we have six am flight. But, what I haven’t been so proud is the way I am doing it.

I couldn’t stand watching her chewing the food slowly, dress herself with so many things to do in between, doh, it makes my voice raise. I walk fast and she has to catch me often. I am the type of continously babbling mother when something doesn’t suit my way.

There were few recent situations that slapped me quite much. Some situations where it is clearly shown that parents are often so selfish. And it makes me wonder, what I have been doing as a mother other than scolding and asking her to do things?

Yesterday, I needed to buy a pair of shoes. I have been looking for it for days and still havent got the right one. My small feet is quite complicated. Having 35 shoes size is not normal here and for formal shoes, it’s pretty hard to find that size. I am quite desperate about this one due to certain family wedding in few weeks, and I think I don’t have a proper shoes that go well with the attire.

Other than the size, what makes it more complicated is my other term and condition which said it should be wearable daily after the wedding. So, rather than a selop, I want a black suede high heels, high enough to look good in kain, short and comfortable enough to use daily. To make it fussier, price is limited to certain range.

Ninety percents of my formal shoes are all european brands. Gabor, Bally, and two less famous names purchased in Paris. It’s simply because they have 35 size in their catalog and such brands couldn’t be found just anywhere. Only in specific shopping centres in the south. I couldn’t wait until next week because the traffic would be so unbearable after payday. So, yesterday was non-negotiable. For me who doesn’t like shopping around, more, going far just for a pair of shoes, this one must be that important and desperate.

Things often got so twisted when you want something the most. Right after arrived there, Metro was closed for renovation until June and the only option was Sogo. But, I know Sogo didn’t offer as many choices as Metro. The first round, several pairs caught my attention, tried it,but not that convincing to bring it to the cashier.

After some considerations, I decided to cross the street and looked for some alternatives in the next shopping centre. It was funnier that the very same thing happened here. Debenhams was no longer there, Sogo wasn’t there too and said they’ve been preparing for an re-opening in few months. It was a bit sad but my spirit and hope were still high. I returned to the first mall and visited Sogo once more, hoping this time the result might be different. Because I always believe, you might miss something on the first chance. That’s why second chance is always available in my dictionary.

But, sadly, the result didn’t change at all. After spent almost three hours, I decided to drive to another nearest Sogo. Things I do for something I really want.

It was at least a good choice to go before payday because the traffic was soo nice, that really kept my spirit high, haha. In twenty minutes, I had arrived to next Sogo. What made the spirit was even higher, this Sogo was much bigger and had more options. There would be at least one pair that suited my preference. I also had bargaining my self about the price. As long as it comfortable, a bit higher from the budget would be okay, knowing it would last longer too.

The hope was slowly getting lower when after few laps of searching in almost every table and brand available, many trials this and that, the right one was still nowhere to be found. Sometimes the size,sometimes the price, or sometime when the size and the price fit, it hurt and pressed the toes umcomfortably while wearing it.

It was a bit frustrating until at certain point I told my self, “come on, just settle for less with the closest suitable one. We have spent too much time on this. Just choose one”.

But then, just like what I had told my self and also for Langit later about marriage, I can’t settle for less. It’s better to wait longer and staying without it than settle for less just because you have to do it. Even when you are desperate enough.

I left another Sogo empty handed.

Gave up? Not yet.

I decided to find women shoes corridor stores and tried to find the one in every store. Then, the wait was finally over. I found the right one in the most unexpected place. Just as precise as I really wanted.

A simple black suede with proper heels 35 size shoes. Fit my feet beautifully, meet my budget perfectly.

I wore it right after asar prayer and it didn’t hurt at all. The right shoes won’t hurt your feet. A bit tiring about the heels maybe unavoidable, but it wont give any harms.

That is just like when you’re marrying the right person on the right time.

Now, the question is : who was the most patient one in this process?

I wasn’t. Langit was.

I was surely patient since I was the one who had the urge. But Langit had no advantage at all.

She had been following me since morning, taking care some works too before shoes searching, then stopped by at my father’s house after that. We just arrived home around 8 pm. Almost twelve hours outside and no single frowning and nagging along that time.

If I were her, I would have been lying on the mall floor and nagging my parents to go home after three hours. Just like what I did during her first field trip few weeks ago. I withdrew and asked permission to leave early after survived the crowd and the noise for four hours and took her home.

I apologized to her few times yesterday when she looked tired, but she coped up with that quite well. She tried many women shoes too, played with her toys, even tried several kids shoes on the last store when I found the one. The eyes said she wanted them too but since she knew and being told that she had her new shoes recently, she didn’t nag further.

When we arrived home, she asked me quietly, “can I have some chips? Satu aja,”. She asked for some Pringles chips she got from birthday goody bag that I have kept. It was reachable enough for her to take it, and it was actually hers too, but I banned her from eating it much. One until three pieces per two or three days would be fine but not everyday. She asked me on Friday and Saturday and I said no. I couldn’t say no for what she had been through yesterday. So, permission granted.

I was busy taking care of clean laundry at rooms while she was watching and munching on the couch at the living room. After few minutes, when I was almost done with all the stuff and remembered to check her to make sure she didn’t keep eating it, I saw her just watching with the tiny piece of pringles on her hand.

She didn’t hold the tube at all. The pringles can was on the same place as I put it. It means, she just took few of those. And judging from the short interval time from asking permission until I watched her, she might really take it one single chip as she told me.

(Updated : two days later she asked me again for another chip. She said one. This time I really watched her and it still surprised me that she really took literally one then returned the tube to its original place. After that, she ate the chips little by little. But never asked for more).

I am a bit ashamed to say I am really proud of her.

Being a geographically single parent for a year, surely took so much patience and I have done it well, but compared to this little girl, my patience level is still too low.

Glad we safely and sanely passed this one year.

I wont stop being impatient after this writing for sure, but hopefully being a bit more mindful about something that deserves being fussed.

Like just what I did before finished this writing.

Scolding her for breaking another plate. Not much, just enough.

Sigh.

Posted in Thoughts

An Anniversary to Celebrate

My late mother told me that your workplace should become your second home. One that you return to every single day, spent most of the day there, it would only be better to feel like home in such place. Definition of home is not merely where the heart is. It’s a place where you know you belong, a place filled with joy with the people you love.

I still remember vividly how that March 6, 2004 was. I was wearing blue stripes shirt with brown skirt, took M18 angkot with the one who’d been always there during my first of everything that happened before 2012. I spent my first 2 hours in my second home. Today, it’s been fifteen years since that cloudy Saturday.

I once wrote about long term relationship. This playground is one of long term relationships that I treasure the most. One that keeps me sane during the worst broken heart, one that helped a lot during hard times, one that sent me achieved three my 20 something dreams, its flexibility that allowed me to take care of my mother during her last days as well as being able to be present for Langit most of the time, one that became the only resource for first 6 months of residency, an escape that I longed for comeback after first two crazy months of motherhood. One that always gives me happiness while doing it.

Like Ron Weasley said to Harry Potter when that boy who lived arrived for the first time at The Burrow : “It’s not much. But, yeah, it’s home”.

It describes precisely what I feel about this job. It might be not the fanciest job, the most sophisticated one, or the highest paid too, but for me, it’s home.

Happy 15th anniversary, home.

Posted in Thoughts

Change of Heart

After letting go lots of meaningful and important things in life that have been around for years, or almost a whole of my age, last month, slowly, the heart starts adapting well to new changes. For someone who is always holding on something for a long time,the way this heart changes is quite surprising.

Used to against the old quote saying that home is where the heart is and it’s not about the place. Stayed in the same house for more than 30 years, then how come home was not about the place? Many important moments in life took place there. But, maybe I forget something : what makes a home is the people inside. So when the people were gone, the feeling followed.

The change of home brings new findings too. I had always been afraid of either basement or high level parking. Never bring a car to any places when I know the parking doesn’t provide land parking. But then, in this new home, I finally overcome the fear after years. I finally nail sharp climbing to the upper level parking, although everytime I do it, I pray loudly, take my breath slowly and spell many zikir until it is safe enough.

In this new home, I find more time for my self. Especially in the morning and after a long tiring day. Morning rush feels more comfortable since I only take care two easy girls like me and my daughter when the doctor is not around.

It’s quite hard to believe that now I feel more comfortable staying in my new home than the one I had been staying for more than thirty years. Although I still visit it often and some parts of my needs depend on there, but staying overnight doesn’t feel the same anymore. Surprisingly, Langit feels the same way too since she keeps telling me to go back to her new home when we stay for few hours in her old one.

I came to realize although it might be not always pleasant, but some changes are unavoidable and needed to continue life. To see the next new best things life offers ahead. To grab and learn new opportunities to grow.

Staying long in comfort zones is still my favorite place to be. The place where I have luxuries to not doing things I have to do alone in my new home. But, some changes that have been offered along my life, it brought more blessings and surely are much better than my fears. Who knows in few years I turn out to be an acceptable cook when the situation makes me do it? Cooking is never my thing. It’s sad because I was born from a very great one. The greatest well known cook in family. If it really comes true, then I believe that miracle does exist.

Pray for more strengths as few more major changes might have taken place this year.

It’s scary.